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Living out the reality of God in your home

February 16, 2009 by  22 Comments

I am off to Dallas in a couple of days and I look so forward to seeing so many moms there. I consider it such a privilege to be able to serve God by serving moms, because they are the trainers and developers of leaders of the next generation. Often people have asked me why I am traveling so much and working so hard at this season of life. I have to. I keep hearing of precious young adults who are compromising their morals, giving up their faith, making decisions that bring about scars in their hearts and souls. I sometimes feel that I have only a limited time to reach as many moms and parents as I can in my lifetime and I want to meet Jesus face to face and be able to say, “I gave my whole heart and time and life to you and your kingdom’s cause because I love you. You are worthy of all of my praise and moments and life. I treasure you and sought to be a steward of all the wonderful truth you taught me.” We must each take serious our responsibility to be a steward of His grace, love and redemption.

Our young adult children are confronted more than ever with post modern values. Almost every movie, television show, book has an expectation of immorality, infidelity, impurity. Our children are confronted with it at every turn. There are fewer and fewer models that we can point to, to say, “follow His pattern of leadership, of sacrifice, of holiness.”

 That is why we must, in our homes, be a true and vibrant picture of the living God, of the depth of Jesus. However, we must ponder often what that means. I have asked myself often just what it is that is causing so many of our older children to fall. My children have precious friends who have grown up with godly parents and heard all the messages of the gospel, and yet they still turn away from God. Many of these parents were faithful and wonderful. But I will share with you what I am learning.

It is a very lonely world out there for godly children. They will find few young adults with strong values and  convictions. They will have to stand alone again and again amongst the crowd–the veritable sea of people who are not living with a paradigm of faithfulness to their creator. Loneliness is very difficult to bear over and over and over again. Therefore, we need to stand in the gap, to be there for our children, to reach out to them, to understand their temptation, to keep giving and giving and giving–to continue being the servant leader that Jesus was.

But there is something else I have been thinking about. Often, in our zealousness, we live by fear in the presence of our children. We tell them of the harsh realities of the world, we make them memorize verses, we indoctrinate them with our philosophy and focus on their behavior–we follow methods and formulas and law. But we must understand that it is only when we reach their hearts and pass on a true love of God that they will become engaged in His life.

I have focused my past few years of spiritual life on Jesus Himself. Jesus is, according to Hebrews 1:3, “The radiance of His glory, the exact representation of his nature, and upholds all things by the word of His power.” In other words, when you see Jesus, you see God, himself, living in the flesh.”

Looking at Jesus is to look and behold God himself. Jesus was a man who walked on water, was tossed about in the stormy sea on a smelly fishing boat, he held a picnic and satisfied the hunger of thousands of people several times–he didn’t just talk about truth, he satiated hunger of rumbling stomachs. Jesus touched the untouchables–he touched with tenderness and love a prostitute, lepers, sick and dying. He held and fondled on his knee children and laughed with them and loved them. Jesus was not afraid to rage at the religious leaders who led people in legalism and performance but were not compassionate–he was not afraid of the rulers. He talked of birds, trees, lilies, mountains, and creation. Jesus washed one hundred and twenty dirty toes, the night before he died, and wiped them tenderly with a towel as a mother bathes the children she loves. He celebrated and drank wine at a wedding, cooked fish on the beach and validated women for their service and tender love of himself.

People have often asked me why I emphasize beauty–art, candles, beautiful music, a cup of tea, cinnamon rolls, great stories and books and celebrating life. It is because I want to bring the reality of God and His life into my home. He painted the skies and the flowers, her touched human flesh, he gave a capacity to think, he told epoch stories through prophets and in his sermons, he fed and celebrated amongst his own disciples. He comforted the sad, healed the broken hearted, inspired the vigorous young men amongst him to live for a kingdom that would never end. He modeled, through his every waking hour, the vast love, compassion, holiness, beauty, touchable food, and servant leadership that expresses the very heart of God. Jesus is not just a thought to be understood, a verse to be memorized, but a living, breathing, vibrant, loving, personal God who lives and breathes amongst us in my home each day. He is the way and He is with us along the way.

It is the life and reality of a God who came to love and serve and redeem that is what my children long for in their hearts. They experience this through my life and service and love and excellence and faith and confident celebration of life. I can only give to them what I have found by loving Him on my own, by seeing  Him with my own eyes, but understanding Him in my own quiet time and then living from a soul fully engaged in Him. The joy of life, which is contagious, comes from being in His presence and enjoying Him. (In His presence is fullness of joy and in His right hand are pleasures evermore. Do I experience this? Do I believe it? Do I live it?)

In my personal relationship with my children where I love and value and serve them as Jesus did His own disciples, my children will not just hear of doctrine and manners and chores, but they will feel the touch of Christ, the compassion of Christ, the encouraging words of Christ and they will learn to love Him because they have felt and seen and lived love in the minutes of our lives together. Even as Jesus said, “I will never leave you or forsake you,” so I will let my children know, “I will never leave you or forsake you–I will be praying for you, I will celebrate life with you (and cook for you and give you gift cards when you are far away from me.) and you can tell me anything and I will be your friend and companion as well as your leader and guide.

Love will be the foundation of our discipleship relationship as love is the foundation of Jesus’ relationship with me.

So when our children are out in the world, (Jesus said he would not take His disciples out of the world, but he asked the father to keep them from the evil one–to deliver them from temptation–we must send our disciples into the world as Jesus did, when they have been trained and understood the kingdom and the King, that when they are mature, they can also be redeemers.), we will still be with them, close to them, pursuing them and active  in their lives. Lonely children, even young adults, always need to have someone to lift them up, to encourage them, to believe in them, to help them–it is the way of discipleship, motherhood and servant leadership–it is the reality of Christ lived through us.

So, as I go to spread these messages, I would so appreciate your prayers, for safety in travel, for health for my family as we serve, for my children to stay faithful and to live in His strength and reality, as I feel that as Clay and I are serving our wonderful Lord, Satan hates us even more and my children become targets. Please pray for them and for us. I so appreciate so many of you who help and give and serve and pray for us together in the ministry God has called us to. May each of you be blessed and prosper in His grace, strength and love today.

Filed Under: Beauty, Bible Studies, Children, Conferences, Home, Ministry, Nature, Parenting, Relationships

Perfect! Not a word high on my vocabulary as an expectation of life

February 7, 2009 by  20 Comments

Joy with two of her sweet girlfriends–none perfect but all precious.

I wrote the blog below a couple of years ago, but thought it might be relevant now. The hardest part for me and for my children as public figures is that our public life is so unreal compared to our personal lives. My children love just being home withouth anyone watching or expecting them to be “Clarksons.” I am such a normal person who plods along, but my heart is for Jesus and He is all the good I have. So, though, written a couple of years ago, still applies today! Here it is:

When I was in California recently, I had several experiences that were similar. Basically all of them were about how perfect they thought my life and kids must be. If I had expected perfection as a goal for my children, my marriage or my behavior, I know from the start I would be guaranteed failure. What about, “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Romans”There is none righteous, no not one.” Isaiah

“He is mindful that we are but dust.” Psalm 103

“Wretched man that I am. Who will set me free?” Paul about himself in Romans 7One mom said, “It is easy for Sally to make her home a life-giving place. But I live in a condominium.”

I began to learn to be life-giving when I was living in a tiny house (900 square feet) in Vienna whose walls leaked rain when we had storms and where we had pigeons in the attic (named them Walter!)

But it was there, when I looked out on a gray, drab apartment building outside my window, that was 8 stories high. All windows were the same, drab and dirty. But in one window sill, someone had planted a flower box full  of red geraniums. In a wall of gray, the beautiful flowers stood out like a flame.

I decided right then that I would be like that one apartment out of hundreds–that no matter how small or old, I would bring life and beauty to my home–that I would create life as God did.

But of course I learned as I went. It was not house beautiful, but beauty in the house.

Next came cooking and baking. Learned as I went. Some meals were a success. Some a failure. Some just not to the taste of my family. (Hate to waste my time on unappreciative people!)But this meant years of days of dirty dishes and pots and pans and bowls in the sink. Our home is always in the process of being in and out of messes.

Didn’t ever even think about being a mom when I was a young single woman–hate to admit it but it was true! I wanted to be in love and get married, but I was never one of those who longed for a baby–eventually got to that, but had to learn how to love my children and my noisy home and all the demands. it was not natural to me–but I leaned into it and learned how slowly but surely.

As one of my children say, “Mom, our days have not been easy and we have had no support systems and I don’t know how we made it, but we have lots of great memories.”

I had to learn almost everything that I now do. I have taught myself to cook, decorate, educate my children, how to become more mature in marriage; how to do chores and work (didn’t grow up doing it!), how to nurse my babies (even when one doctor told me that I might cause my child brain damage because I had been sick with the flu when she was born and she was a high risk baby.) Moved 17 times, had 3 asthmatics, 3 ocd kids, one adhd, fires (one in Vienna), floods (3 in our house), etc. (smile)

In the midst of such a life, there are lots of ups and downs. Children are immature and a mess, teens are self-centered and self-absorbed; and all are sinful. But, I have a picture of being a redeemer–bringing light in the darkness, moving along on the pathway of ideals and maturity one step at a time, while holding God’s hand.

Same with my children. My goal was reaching their hearts with the love of God and showing them His reality, so that they could find His grace and truth every day. Now that is doable. All I have to do is love God every day. Love Him, and show Him to my children. Since I am not expected by God to be perfect, I don’t expect them to be either. No one likes to live in a place where failure is likely to happen all the time. If moms expect perfection, then their children
will want to run far from them. If women think God wants them to be perfect, they will always live in guilt and defeat or eventually want to quit their ideals, because there will be no joy.

Now, I will admit, that feeling inadequate is a mantle I am likely to wear many times, as I have always struggled with my “imperfect personality.” Seems from time to time I put my foot in my mouth. But that is why I knew my children needed to live in a home of grace, because I needed God’s grace every day.

It is as I seek to celebrate life, live in grace, know his love and appreciate His gentleness and compassion, that it grows in my heart. I have not always known how to walk this journey, but I have always had a hand to hold on to and wisdom to practice and apply.  It is journey–a long distance run. Not a perfect husband. Not a perfect wife. Not perfect devotionals or perfect method of discipline. Just a grace walk. Not perfect children–but children with great hearts, best friends, loving, living, laughing, sharing, arguing, being petty and then getting back to the center one more time to do it all over again.

Now I am off to eat a chocolate chip cookie–even my diet and self-discipline isn’t perfect–but I think after a tiring year, I am going to just enjoy myself and rest and worry about losing 10 pounds in one week another time!

PS A great blog entry that you will love: http://www.goodmorninggirls.org/ Thanks sweet Angela!

Filed Under: Children, Home, Homemaking, Joyful Life, Trust in God

The Power of a gentle touch

January 28, 2009 by  13 Comments


“It is enough; now, O Lord, take my life, for I am not better than my fathers.” And he lay down and slept under a juniper tree; and behold there was an angel touching him, and he said, “Arise and eat.”
I Kings 19:4-5

What a wonderful time we had in Charlotte with so many moms last weekend. Great talks and discussions and I think the Lord met with so many in their place of need. I was so grateful to be a part and was blessed by so many moms–seeing old friends, connecting with new–and later on, when I have time, I will even show you a new favorite tea cup that was given to me by an angel, but I have to hurry now as I have to teach a history class soon.

But, I do put a lot of energy into speaking and the older I get, I find myself completely drained afterwards. I feel like Jesus in the parable about the woman who touched the hem of his garment and “the strength went out of him.” And so sometimes I feel, that “the strength literally goes out of me.”

But last night, after we had been reading a book outloud and had a great dinner, Joy came to me and said, “Mom, I have a surprise for you. Go take a hot bath and before you get into the tub, I want to put an avocado mask on you that I was reading about.” So, I obeyed gladly and she smoothed avocado all over my face with extra for the wrinkles.

After I got out of my bath, she made me close my eyes and led me by the hand into my bedroom. When I opened my eyes, she had gathered about 10 candles and lit them all over my room. She had put on instrumental music and laid out towels and a pillow for me to lay on. She then gave me a hand massage and filed my nails; gave me a wonderful foot message with great smelling lotion; and followed up with a back and shoulder massage. I cannot tell you how the stress went out of my body and I felt like I had been touched by an angel. I slept so soundly last night and every time I awakened, a smile came to my face as I remembered the service of this precious 13 year old and the last words–”Mom, I love you so much and I just wanted to show you my love.”

Sometimes when I am exhausted or drained, I really don’t need anyone to settle my problems or bring answers. I just need sleep or rest. But I also think there is a healing power to touch and affection. Her touch literally melted me last night and gave me rest.

I found over the years that often, the way to reach my boys was by scratching their backs or giving them a shoulder massage at night. I think it is so interesting that after Elijah was totally worn out after confronting Ahab and all of his entourage and also Jezebel, that he became depressed and discouraged. Then we read (two times) that the angel touched him and gave him food, after he had slept.

God has given us physical bodies. They need rest, refreshment and touch. Affection settles crying babies, it stimulates their minds and brain waves, it causes very sick people to get better. How grateful I am, that even though I didn’t know I needed it, that God sent an angel to me last night to touch me and minister to me. It is the first time she has ever done this in such an elaborate way, but I will never forget this gift of love and the sweet friend who administered it to me!

Today, hug those you love, touch the disgruntled, kiss and scratch backs and you who are weary, get rest and sleep and relax and refresh. Grace and peace to you all.

Filed Under: Bible Studies, Conferences, Family, Our Family

Rest and peace–ahhhhhhhh!

January 14, 2009 by  25 Comments

Jessie Wilcox Smith  one of my favorite artists of children! Go make yourself a treat and monkey around a bit!

Galatians 5:1 “It was for freedom that Christ set us free. Therefore, keep standing firm and do not be subject to a yoke of slavery.” (especially stand firm in your ideals before God without letting someone else’s yoke slip around your neck unnecessarily.)

“And the work of righteousness will be peace and the service of righteousness quietness and confidence forever.” Isaiah 32: 17

I have seen some books and articles going around that suggest that moms don’t really need a break from their children and that it is possible to be around them all the time without going crazy. Now, I love my children and I am very committed to family, and I hope I don’t step on anyone’s toes, but it is statements like this that put lots of burden and law on women and make them feel guilty unnecessarily. This is a very long term calling and I think all women need the encouragement of other women at times without having to feel guilty for leaving their children.

I have come to really question truths like the one above because they come across as universal and sound wise, but in the end, I have to say, “Is this law? Is it an unshakeable truth that applies to all moms at all times?” Or is it possible that there is grace for each mom to conduct her own symphony, so to speak, with her family, circumstances and children in mind. “It is for freedom that Christ set us free, therefore, keep standing firm that you may not be subject to a yoke of slavery.”

I wrote a chapter in Seasons of a Mother’s Heart about legalism imposed upon us by others that produces burdens God never intended us to carry. I find it interesting that God purposely left many areas in scripture very vague. No lists about just how to discipline a child, how long to spank, at what age, and for how long, for instance. Or no rule book about what a mom should cook if she was really bringing health to her family or what exact music was acceptable and what music would indeed lead a child astray. Or what it really looks like to submit to a husband-(they are all different and have different preferences!) Not ever a verse that says, “Every mother should stay with her children all the time every hour or else they are not spiritual and their children will go astray.” Or, or, or. There is so much in scripture about living by faith, trusting God and Paul and Jesus were so very clear about not having the heart of a Pharisee and putting heavy loads on people.

Now, I find that we are to use wisdom principles and have quiet times and grow in maturity and of course, I  came to the conclusion that if I wanted to pass on my life and beliefs and vision to my children, I needed to be the one who invested time in them and won their hearts, out of the integrity of my heart. But, seeing my children do well in life and love the Lord and us and continue growing is not as a result of a list of rules that I followed, but as a result of following the Lord, praying, obeying Him and seeking His wisdom and then living by faith and watching His grace. God is in charge and will work in and through the personality and circumstances of my life uniquely, If I walk it with Him.

There are so many wonderful teachers and speakers who have such a good heart and love the Lord and want to encourage. But the bottom line is the word of God is to be our ideal and not just “wisdom” from others that is extra-Biblical and not scripture–and I find God to be a better task master than most humans I have ever known.

I find that so many young moms lacked good families and they want to “do it right” with their own children, and so they are willing to believe anything in print or that they heard a speaker say and then put themselves under great burdens, in the name of Christian ideals, and then eventually find themselves wanting to give up ideals because they are very depressed or overwhelmed.

I find that the longer I walk with the Lord, the more freedom I feel to be who I am. I don’t have to live by anyone else’s laws. Clay and I just have to answer to God and scripture,  not to an arbitrary list of someone else’s standards. I think that living overseas and traveling a lot has helped in this area a little. Every culture I see and national that I meet has a different tradition of worshiping God and a different set of circumstances to deal with coming from a different culture in applying the word of God. When I meet people from all over the world, I realize that God is so much bigger and beyond my own box. And yet, he allows all of us, from so many different points of view, to enter into His rest and redemption and forgiveness because of His wonderful, gracious love.

My real desire in writing this article, though, is to give moms permission to be themselves. There is no “one right way”. Each of you has a different puzzle to solve–different children’s personalities, husbands and even a different personality yourself. Some of you are introverts and some extroverts. But the bottom line is, that as a wise woman, you need to figure out how you can best make it in the long run–loving God and loving your family. 

I am a bit adhd and in order for me to make it as a mom of 4 children, who homeschooled and had very few support systems, I personally had to have variety in my life. If life got too stale, I would go under, so I would create adventure for me and for my children. I am also a bit introverted in some ways and if I am around people all the time for days and months at a time, I will indeed explode! Clay and I figured out that I could go to a coffee shop early a couple of days a week at 6 a.m. and have coffee and a quiet time and write in my journal and then come home by 7:45 a.m. and then he could go to work–and I felt like a different person and he was happy to take care of the kids during that time.  (Especially during the years Joy had nocturnal asthma every night for a year and a half–I needed a break just to keep sane!) I can’t live without my quiet time, to think and plan and get perspective. Now there were plenty of times when the kids were sick or Clay was out of town or things just fell apart–and I didn’t get time alone for weeks on end. But, I learned that for me to last well for a long time, I had to figure out how to find time in my schedule to have some alone time. 

Each season was different. I have found this season of my life as one of the hardest. (as I have no control over my sweet older kids needs or schedules and there is always an interruption–always and every day and every hour!) When my children were all little, I had a group–we were a clan! and could tell them when we would do things and then I had each child have a quiet hour every afternoon–I would put books in a basket for them and fun magazines and let them have a cup of something to drink–like hot cocoa–and then they would all have to stay in their own areas for an hour. It helped my kids to become readers and to learn to enjoy time alone, un-entertained. But it also gave me time to look forward to every day, where I could have my own cup of tea that no one else could drink and a little time to regroup or rest or make a phone call. Now, it wasn’t perfect and there were lots of interruptions, but in general, it worked for me. It was an anchor for all of us to look forward to in our day. But this is not a standard for you–you might want something different or have a whole different kind of preferences to work with. I also would leave the house when we were having too much stress–go to a park, or a ride in the mountains to listen to music or a book on tape with Hot Chocolate to drink–as just getting out helped them and me!

Now, when my older kids are home, I am interrupted at every point. But I want so much to be with them and spend time with them and continue building on our relationship that I make myself available as much as possible. On holidays, I never know who is going to wake up when or eat when or come or go when, as they all have their own schedules and friends and commitments. So, I have had to make a new plan for this season. But, I would have gone under long ago if I hadn’t figured out my personality and my needs and how to best stay on top of emotions and needs in the midst of always giving to others. I need to stay healthy  so that everyone else can find strength from me.

The Mama is the key. If she is watching over her heart with all diligence and her heart is becoming depleted and dry, then she needs a plan. Where can I go to become spiritually encouraged? What book can I read? What would fill my cup, emotionally, spiritually, physically and still fit the puzzle of my family?

Who can I spend time with that can encourage me? If a mom’s heart stay’s full, she will always have the strength to give to all those who need her. However, it is one of the attributes that I admire most–the ability to manage your life, so as to keep going and going. I had to learn that the sabbath rest was God’s idea. I had to figure out how to take Sunday’s as a day of rest so that I didn’t burn out. I had to figure out how I could refresh and regroup after so many conferences, as this is the vocation Clay and I were called to. Clay is a real visionary and architect of new ideas and there is not end to what He might dream up. We married knowing that we would be committed to ministry until we went senile or died. It has meant a different life, schedule, commitments and responsibilities than almost anyone I know. But we worked together over the years to figure out what we needed as a family to protect our inner circle with each other and to keep our hearts warm to each other, the Lord and our children. But, if we read some of the books that are out there, we would have quit what we are doing long ago–because we don’t fit the mold or anyone’s idea of what a perfect schedule or balance to life is. Yet, we feel such a privilege to do what we do and we want to keep working all the more until we see Jesus.

But all that to say, God is on your side. He is so well pleased that you are seeking to please Him and to love your children and husband. He no more expects perfection out of you than He did of Peter! And He is not surprised when you blow it–as a matter of fact, he would probably say to you, (or me) “Sally, I know that when the cock crows (or the children push you over the edge) you are going to blow it. But take courage, because I have prayed for you that when you get yourself together again, you will strengthen the brethern” In other words, he would say, “I am with you. I understand you. I love you and I will help you make it. Now, go get some sleep or go have fun or go be with a friend and know that it will all be fine. I am the one in control–even of your children, their future, your finances, your mental health. Don’t stress. Just rest–in me.”

I have to live this way–it is the only way to maintain joy in the midst–to know that He will never, never leave me or forsake me. He will always love me. He is always my helper and good shepherd and prayer warrior and redeemer and model of how to live a servant life and yet still find time alone with the Father– he is even now, building a great home for me to live in forever in eternity, which I can’t wait to go to.

Grace and peace to all of you precious ones this January time of life.
Sally
Sally@wholeheart.org

PS I had so much fun Monday. One of my genius friends figured out that most of us had conference calling on our phone and so eight of us joined together for a conference call and we all prayed together for a long time and giggled and loved each other–for the community we were having over a phone call that connected all of our phones together. It was fun and so very encouraging to me and to Joy–as several prayed and prayed for her and it filled her heart, too. I am so blessed to have friends who will pray with me. You call one person and then put them on flash and then call another person. Then that person calls another person and puts them on flash and then calls another person and so on. If you find enough people who have this option on their phone (most phone agreements come with it!) you could endlessly connect with friends everywhere.

Filed Under: Art, Bible Studies, Mothering, My Books, Parenting, Trust in God

The Joy of the Lord is my strength–a New Year Resolve in the midst of trials!

January 6, 2009 by  12 Comments

“Thy words were found and I ate them, And they words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart; For I have been called by Thy name, O Lord God of hosts.” Jeremiah 15: 16

“Blessed is the man who trust in the Lord, and whose trust is the Lord. For he will be like a tree planted by the water. That extends its roots by a stream and will not fear when the heat comes; And it will not be anxious in the year of drought Nor cease to yield fruit.” Jeremiah 17: 7-8

Another new year is upon us! This year will be on filled with fears and anxieties and stresses–and I know that it will be–but how I handle the stresses and face the trials will totally determine the fruitfulness and grace with which we live each day. Our own family is faced with all sorts of financial demands and insecurities–the future of Whole Heart–our livelihood and the ability to pay our staff, usually is determined by filling our conferences. But this year, we know many precious friends have lost their jobs and are under financial stress–we are all affected by this downturn of the economy. Clay and I don’t know any other kind of work–it is our life’s work to minister to families–what is our future?

We know so many of you face these and other issues. Yet, it is not the battles that defeat us, but how well we fight in the battles that determine our outcome and victory. Depression and fear are natural results of being in and surrounded by difficulties–three times in John we read that Jesus was troubled–but it is moving into the presence of the Lord–our commander, in which we see life from His eyes, refocus and gain strength and instruction about how we can move ahead with grace.

But I have come to love the first few mornings I can really get alone with the Lord in the days of a new year. It is the foundation of my ability to be able to face days with courage and hope and peace. I get excited about  what is ahead, what ways I will see Him working in my life and in the lives of my children–but I don’t get excited until I am alone in His presence!

A couple of nights ago, I found myself around 10 :45 p.m.  at night on my 7th night in a hotel room at our acting competition in Orlando. I was trying to pack all of our bags while Joy and Nate were out and about on the last night, fellowshipping with friends, saying goodbyes and getting their last few minutes of talking. Weary to the bone doesn’t even describe how I was feeling–I was feeling exhausted and depleted for 28 years of giving, giving, giving! Seems I have spent myself on others–forever–serving them, loving them, providing for them, and caring for their endless needs. So, the thoughts were going that invaded my mind. Whether my husband and children or the many in our ministry or friends, I have spent myself as much as possible for as many years as I can remember. But this night, when  I had to pack up–again–and knew that we would only get 2-3 hours of sleep before our alarm awakened us at 3:20 a. m. so that we could get to our taxi, to the airport, and then board our 6 o’clock plane–this night–I felt pretty much like giving up–or giving in–whatever that meant!  But I also knew that decisions should never be made at night–happy hormones are down and need a night of sleep to build them up again–never pay attention to the dark thoughts of a late night! They kill and deplete and destroy!

“I think I need a long, long rest, Lord. I think I may be getting irrelevant, dried up, unusable–I don’t think I can go one more year in ministry. I am tired and drained and discouraged! I am tired and this is only the first trip of our busiest season yet. Can I please have a year off–just to rest, refresh and gain perspective?”

And so the dark cloud swirled around, hovering around my depleted heart, threatening and accusing and intimidating! But, after many, many years of learning to put one foot in front of the other, I finished packing. Nate came in and we had a 45 minute talk–my last time with him before he went back to New York the next day–so I had strength to give to him, since I knew it would be my last face to face for a while! Just as I finished with him, then, Joy came in changed into her “flying” clothes and crawled in bed with me. Seems she was overwrought from tiredness and depleted adrenalin from many competitions and was a little weepy. “Mom, I can’t get to sleep. Will you please snuggle with me? I just need to be close to someone.”

So I snuggled, rubbed her head, until 1:00 a.m.–one more time, I could give out one more time–because this little bundle was so very precious to me. Finally fell asleep, looking at the clock for the last time at 1:23! The impossible had been done again–giving out again–there had been enough strength afterall–in spite of my emotions and thoughts!

Yesterday was a blur–sleeping like we were drugged on the plane. But, Clay picked me up at the Denver airport with my own home-made cinnamon bread, toasted; with cheese and toasted pecans and a welcome heart for the hour long trip home. When Joy and I arrived home, Sarah and Joel had lit every candle in our house; they had cleaned up all the Christmas stuff and redecorated with valentine stuff–and put on a beautiful instrumental c.d.; and made a fresh pot of tea with muffins for a 9:30 a.m. tea time. Now, I would have only two more days with them before they both took off to Boston, where Joel, just this week, in the nick of time, had found amazing, great, inexpensive housing near to the campus–another story!

But, just now, Oh, to be home. For so many years, this is how I had greeted them–after trips, in the mornings, when they returned home from adventures. How very encouraged I was to be in the life of home again-that my own, young adult children had created for me. Then, Joy and I slept and caught up on phone calls and mail and the stories Clay, Joel and Sarah had to share–and we shared all about our adventures with them, and I fell into bed shortly after 9 p.m. last night.

This morning, I awakened wide-awake at 4:45. Slipping out of bed, I snuck (is that a word?) downstairs, made some tea, lit our fire and a candle, and almost got butterflies in my stomach because, finally, I would get some much needed time with my beloved and most precious friend–the Lord. Slowly, as I read the Word–His word, I could feel my burdens lightening, my heart getting slowly realigned with His; joy beginning to fill my heart; peace about trusting in His hand to provide for our many needs ahead; and assurance that He would meet me at every point along the way.

Clay had shared a verse with me for the last chapter of the book I have to finish this week–Jeremiah 15: 16–just what I needed this morning–”Thy words became for me a joy and the delight of my heart.” His words, the words of my beloved Father, creator, shepherd–the one who wants to care for me this year-the one who longs to speak to me and to have me listen to Him–His words become the delight of my heart.”

And so I looked just across the page of my Bible to another couple of verses–Blessed is she (my slight change!) who trusts in the Lord (not in money, things, jobs, people–but in Him) and whose trust is the Lord–(He alone is my strength, help, source of life, and wisdom)–For and this is an important little word–for–if–a person trusts the Lord and has him as their strength–he will be planted–placed by water–a source of life–roots will go down into His stream of life–fear will not be a part of his life when heat and drought come–but instead, fruit will be produced! This person will not cease to yield fruit–even in drought–even in heat–but the water of His life–will be the source to provide fruit that will never cease.

These are the words my weary heart and mind needed to feed upon–just what I needed to keep going with strength and energy to meet all He will bring my way. He is real. He is with me. He is with you–as a little girl, as Joy did with me, go to Him for snuggling, for reassurance, for love and for peace. He is ready to hold you and love you.

How reassuring to me-I see drought ahead–heat ahead–difficult times. I think many are in the refining fire of God’s love and care–God is not willing for us to depend on materialism–that is idolatry. He doesn’t want us to be lazy and corrupt in our nature–He wants us to be like Him–so our hearts and souls may be tested and refined–but, we will find Him and His ways in our life to be faithful–true–good and truly fulfilling–and joyful. But, the bottom line is–if we trust Him and make Him our trust, if we respond to His loving discipline, if we bring His light and life into the dark places; if we obey his words and life–then the waters of His love and encouragement spring forth in our hearts and we sense his presence and love anew–enough for each day.

I have been learning so much in the past months about how to look at the future with hope; how to walk with God; how to continue to find strength–I can’t wait for my conferences to share many of these new lessons with you! And am praying that many of you will still find a way to come. There is something amazing that happens in these conferences where women are gathered together in a large group for fellowship, strength and encouragement and prayer and fun–the life of Christ is almost palpable. We have seen so many lives changed and so many families strengthened for the tasks of life.

But we are also trying hard to figure out new technology on our website and in our ministry to put some of these conferences online so that women all over the world may partake. Please pray for the Lord to help us with this–to provide the technical support as well as the financial support to undertake these projects very soon.

(Some very unexpected support came from friends in Australia that encouraged us to keep going in this direction. Many of you very generously supported us at the end of this year to help us keep going–and we know that many who sent in financial contributions sent them even though they had lost jobs–we were humbled and overwhelmed with thanksgiving for each person who sacrificed and gave that we may keep going! -I have to say that this makes Clay and me really want to be good stewards of your love, faith and support. We feel such a privilege to be a part of God’s hands and words and life in this world to parents.)

I will be writing more, later this week, about other ways that the Life of God grows in our hearts and encourages us. But wanted to say hi, we are praying for the many wonderful moms and families that the Lord brings our way. May you find His beauty, strength, grace and peace today. May He fill you with renewed joy. Blessings of His grace to all of you in 2009–may we live to tell stories of His faithfulness to all of us this year through all eternity.
Sally
Sally@wholeheart.org

PS We will be contacting the two winners of the $50 coupon from Whole Heart from those who advertised our conferences in your email or newsletter in December. They will be contacted today! We will give 2 more $50 away to those of you who advertise in January for the Charlotte, Irvine and Dallas/Ft. Worth conference–to enter your name in our contest, please send Jennice  your name and phone number and where you advertised our conferences. You may go here Wholeheart.org and look under conferences for email information and letters that have already been written that you can use for your announcement. We so appreciate those of you who are helping us get the word out. Now that the holidays are out of the way, many will begin to think about the possibility of coming and your announcement may just help a discouraged mom to come for the encouragement she needs. We so appreciate your helping our ministry in this way!

Filed Under: Bible Studies, Family, Home, Joyful Life, Ministry, Our Family, Travel

This and that and the training of future disciples!

December 29, 2008 by  6 Comments

Seven a.m. found us at the airport this morning only to find out that our flight to Orlando will be an hour late.  We left our house at 5 a.m. and sweet Joel took his turn to transport us. A generous offer to send Joy and Nate to the national competition if I would speak was irresistible  as I take advantage of every training opportunity for my children that I can. Training brings skill, confidence, poise and grace to children as they learn, experience by experience how to build their skills at relating to life and to people.

Some have asked me how I can allow my children to go into the world to dangerous places–New York, Boston, overseas, etc. I think that your goals and philosophy will determine so much of what you do and practice. Clay and I talked hours and hours about our ideals for our children. Our ultimate goal was to teach and model to our children what is looked like for them to walk with God. Our goal wasn’t just to teach them morality, or to indoctrinate them spiritually, but to cultivate in them a heart for God, a heart for His word, and to slowly give them independence so that they would be able to make good choices and have convictions.

We often talked about “he who is faithful with small things will be faithful in much.” And for us this meant, little by little, giving them opportunities to walk with God, to make decisions; to practice being responsible with us, so that as we walked alongside them, we could help them, pick them up, teach them to learn from mistakes while they were still at home, and then always say, “God has a work for you to do in your lifetime and in this world. Your personal integrity will be the platform from which you will give your messages. If you are faithful at home, we will help you to expand your borders.”

Jesus said of his disciples, “Father, I do not ask you to take them out of the world, but to keep them from the evil one.” Jesus sent his disciples into the world to bring His light and redemption and love. How can we as parents have a different goal? Am I ever worried? Of course I am. it is a dangerous world out there. But having prayed for them and told them all their lives that they were to be kingdom bearers in the world–that they would be God’s hands and feet and mouth to lost people, then we had to support them, pray for them and be accountable to them as God began to give them dreams and to open doors for them.

Clay and I did decide that our children needed a transitional year between high school graduation and college or moving away. Each lived at home, worked, built faithfulness and proved their character. This year, we developed opportunities for the kids to expand their borders and to spread their wings. We stay face to face and very active in our children’s lives–and we did send them to lots of training places with other strong believers (Masterworks, Summit Ministries, World View academy and others Clay attended with the boys). But these were baby steps toward owning their own lives. Each child is different, but the basis of loving discipleship and relationship leadership was always a big part of our lives. However, most of all, we depended on the Lord, prayed a lot and asked His Holy Spirit to work. He is always our confidence. He is our strength and the one we went to in unsure times.

I think that when parents try to hold on to their children as they get older and make them totally dependant on them, they are inhibiting them in their own adult life and in their walk with the Lord. There is a  balance and each child is different. But, that is why training and foundations are so important. We taught scripture in the market place of life. High control and protection and training when they were little as we helped them to establish foundations. Then, little by little walking along beside them to let them see what ministry looked like–talkging, talking, talking every step of the way as Jesus did.

That is why we made each of our children speak or sing or serve or perform in some way every year of our mom’s conferences. We wanted them to perceive that they had something to say, something to give, something to do–in helping even those who were in our audiences. Yesterday, Joel and I were talking and he said, “It is funny how all of us feel pretty secure speaking or singing in front of people. You all always said we needed to be message makers and we needed to have experience doing it. I remember one year being so terrified to get up in front of the crowd. But you and Dad prayed and encouraged me through it and now I see that all of us kids perceive ourselves as people with a message. Training and experience made the difference.”

It is fun to finally be at the stage where often our children reflect wisdom from their own hearts–to see that they have owned the messages we had to repeat over and over and over again. So that is why I am excited about this week. Another opportunity to be beside my children, to encourage and instruct them and support  them as they are rubbing shoulders with those outside of their box. Clay has already talked about what he is going to do with our kids who are still home this week–taking them alone to breakfast to talk with them about their ideals and goals. So we will both have time to pour into our kids and to further prepare them to move ahead confidently into their own arenas. Joy and Nate will be in monologues competitions, singing, acting, modeling. Why? Because they have an interest in these areas. When we found out that 98 per cent consume media and only two percent inform the values of media, we could see that it was an arena in which the Lord would call some to be a different kind of model, to bring different values. It is a touch arena, and there will be obstacles for our children along the way, but we will be beside them, praying every day, and talking, talking, talking. But, in obedience to Christ, we want and long for them to have a heart of compassion for the lost. We do not want them to have pharisee hearts–that they are somehow better than others who have fallen–but we want them to have pure hearts, filled with compassion for the lost and broken. We want them to, by God’s grace, take His light and redemption to every corner of the earth in confidence that He is with them and will sustain them and guide them because of their own walk with God.

Please pray for us this week. Please pray for many to come to our conferences as we so long to encourage, help and train precious moms, so that they, too, will grow in their vision about how to train, love and prepare their children to be mature disciples for Christ. Whole Heart Ministries depends on the Lord for our financial stability and it has been our conferences that have helped us to do the work we have been able to do, in order to support our staff and to fund the publishing of our books and materials. We appreciate every bit of help you give to us to be able to reach more families. We so appreciate your prayers. May our wonderful Lord bless and encourage you for a most productive and blessed 2009
 Love, and blessings to you all!
Sally

Filed Under: Children, Conferences, Education, Family, Our Family, Parenting, Prayer, Relationships

Oh, Come let us adore Him

December 23, 2008 by  4 Comments

“Oh, come let us adore Him.”

One evening this week, I was enjoying the sweet fellowship of friends at a Christmas gathering. I was captivated by a tiny, three week old baby girl, wrapped in red velvet and sleeping soundly in her mother’s arms.

Musing on her delicate little hands, and the tiny lips that opened slightly with each deep, sleepy breath, I was struck by her vulnerability. She was totally dependent on her mother for her very life. Cries of hunger would be satisfied by this mother’s milk. Unaware of her need for protection, clothing, and the necessities of life, this little baby’s well being would depend on the benevolence of loving parents. Her very intelligence, moral fiber and vision for life would be shaped by the love bestowed, the integrity lived out and the words treasured and spoken in the moments and experience of life. Everything she would become was at the hands of two young adults.

These thoughts led me to the birth of Jesus. The one who commanded the myriads of stars, galaxies, earthquakes and storms and who could number the hairs of each person born, subjected himself to a fallen world, by placing himself in the hands of frail, fallible human beings. That God would condescend to become a baby, dependent, vulnerable and powerless brought amazement to my heart. Total humility expressed in this miraculous birth in which the God of the universe was willing to bow his being into the most delicate of forms in order to eventually redeem this world back to himself—to become the conqueror of all evil and powers of destruction the world would hold.

I have pondered this for several days. What humility he pictured for us, coming as a normal baby to live amongst the earthy animals, in the presence of the stars and world he had made and entering into the youthful passion of newly-weds, ready to parent the one who would become the redeemer of mankind.  Mixing deity and humanity in the midst and subjecting him to the form of a family, spoke to me of the holy design. Even the son of God would be cared for and prepared to become a savior in the context of family life.

How exalted a position we have, that like Mary and Joseph, we receive into our homes, those dependant children whose souls and lives will be lived with eternal consequences. Home is a place where holy destiny can be embraced. The birthplace was humble, but the consequences of his family life were noble and the outcome redeeming.
I realized that the power of Christ was not in material possessions, fame or prowess, but within the integrity of his very being—lived out in a very normal neighborhood but in the supernatural power that is expressed through the Holy Spirit living in integrity amongst the community of men.

I pray that His humility will give us confidence to live humbly. That the integrity of His heart will shape our words and actions and that our family will be that place of redemption from which others may always find His peace, power and love.

Clay and I wish all of you and your precious families the best of all that our savior brings to us through the wonderful celebration of his miraculous birth. May all of you experience His peace that passes understanding, His love from which we can never be separated and His hope that fuels each of our days with strength until we see Him face to face. Merry, and blessed Christmas to you and yours!

Filed Under: Holidays, Mothering, Ponderings

Take a little time for You!

December 8, 2008 by  10 Comments

This little picture was taken at a pub right outside of Beatrix Potter’s home on a rainy day of our trip to England. We were soaked to the bone and needed a little fortitude in order to face the rain again! (note the sweet hands of Sarah, Joy, and Phyllis, my sweet friend.)

Today I awakened to a house full of people, all hungry and giggly and wound up for the day. We have our friends, the Hamby’s of Lamplighter Books staying with us and I had promised some blueberry, apple, cinnamon pancakes for them and for their daughter and husband. All of us had been to see Scrooge last night and stayed up till almost midnight talking about the events and happenings of our Sunday together. After breakfast, we saw them off to a meeting they must attend.

But a conversation I had as I was cooking and my sweet friend was drinking coffee spurred some thoughts in my mind. I realized that many of my friends who are older and have passed through the aes of their younger children and are now living in grace with their present season eventually had to compromise some of their ideals and expectations of life in order to live it well. Often we develop a noose around our neck that isn’t of the Lord and that causes unnecessary critical attitudes, or feelings of inadequacy or stress. Walking in freedom and reality in the midst of the demands of daily life is the only way to live healthily. I am thankful for my fun talk with my sweet friend this morning as we reflected together on our lives and what the Lord had taught us amidst putting orange juice on the table and stirring pancake batter.

I had big plans for this day–working 6 hours on my book that must be turned in soon–and getting Joy ready for an all day practice for a competition this coming Saturday; preparing for a 2 day meeting that Clay and I have with Focus on the Family tomorrow; planning treats and dinner for Joel’s homecoming Wednesday; and figuring out how to fit in washing clothes, homeschooling, getting everyone fed and cared for–(the Hamby’s leave tomorrow) and other mundane things.

But as I began to move into the day, I felt a little weariness creeping over me. This is only the second week of December, so I knew that from my experience of my last million years, that if I don’t take a little time to regroup and refresh today, I will be totally spent by the time Nathan gets home late next week.

So, about an hour ago, I shifted my expectations today to realistically accomplish what is reasonable and won’t wear me out. I lowered my goals and determined to take some pressure off and decided that I will take at least two hours to have fun and regroup. (My children need this today, too!) So, we will have a quick lunch with friends because we need buddy time, I am not going to write this morning, but just do restful, fun things with Joy–who is exhausted from 6 performances since last week; and I think we will have take out or go out to dinner tonight instead of me cooking the big dinner I had planned.

I have had to learn that no one else in the world will be responsible for my over-all well being. I have a husband and children who love me, but I am responsible for my rest, my quiet time, my eating and exercise and my chill time. I do have countless emails in my inbox that I would love to answer, and there are tasks calling my name around the house, but I have become the queen of turning my head away and sticking to my priorities. I have found that there will be just as many things screaming for my attention tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. But today, I know that my body and mind need a little rest and that when I am a steward of my body, I am protecting my walk with the Lord. I am always simplifying and evaluating if something is worth the effort–(I do think that making things beautiful and special during the holidays are worth the effort as it builds the taste and values and work ethic and ministry skills of my children–but all in its season. But it may not be worth it to answer one more phone call or one more email–as this will certainly steal from my children and husband who need me today.

Each of us has a different puzzle and different personality and we must accept our limitations within our own story and be comfortable being ourselves. I see so many moms seeking to live up to other’s expectations and ideals and then burning out in the process. I have high work times and rest times.

If we don’t eventually make peace with our own life circumstances, then we are in danger of cultivating a heart of bitterness or whining. But if we become the conductors of our own life symphonies and live within our own melody of life, we will last longer more gracefully with the God of grace who leads us.

Take time to regroup today–the rest of December is still coming and you will be the better for it!

Now for a few answers to emails: (and please know that I read every one and would so like to answer every one–but this month I have let my emails mount up by hundreds in taking care of my family–so if I don’t get to yours, write me again–as It is not on purpose that I ignore you, but they get buried in the recesses of my computer! So sorry! I still have to finish Joy well!)

Joel finally got approved for a loan for his classes last week and is on his way home to record an album. He is hoping to sell his album and sing at some events and churches to help make enough money for his housing this spring. Thanks so much for praying for Him. God is working quite a testimony in His life through the journey of trusting Him and I see maturity taking place. He still doesn’t have roomies or housing for Boston, so we are still all praying for something to work out there. I have noticed that the Lord provides the manna for the day, but not usually ahead of time!

As to devotional books I have enjoyed: I love my Celtic Daily Prayer book as it has three scripture readings every day and a little commentary. I keep a Daily Light by my quiet time chair, too. Other times I use Kay Arthur’s Bible studies (did Isaiah last year and thinking about doing Hebrews this spring) and I also keep a list of spiritual books by my bedside for quiet times in the mornings. (Eugene Peterson, Phillip Yancy, Peter Kreeft, Nancy Leigh Demoss and a few other authors have fed my soul in the last year.)

As to advent resources, we have used a lot over the years. I am now using Handel’s Messiah family advent reader with Joy. Also, the family has been using a sweet one about  advents based on  famous old  hymns and Sarah  introduced me to God With  Us for December readings–also excellent.

It would be so much fun for me to have so many of you right here, face to face in front of the fireplace for a relaxed visit. Eternity will be glorious!
Grace and peace today!

Filed Under: Family, Family Favorites, Food, Friends, Holidays, Our Family, Prayer, Reading, Traditions

Celebrating Life and bringing in His glory!

December 5, 2008 by  7 Comments


 
“Home is the resort
of love, of joy, of peace, of plenty,
Where supporting and supported, polish’d friends,
And dear relations mingle into bliss!”
James Thompson

“Shout joyfully to the Lord, all the earth!
Serve the Lord with gladness;
Come before Him with joyful singing.
Know that He is God Himself.”
Psalm 100 1-3a

I think that when the Lord leads me to another book contract, I am the one most blessed when I have to discipline myself to write it. I am in the midst of writing a book about cultivating joy in the midst of disappointments and I am learning so much. One thing I have been stuck with lately is that God mentions gladness and joy over and over again–especially in His presence. There are also many references to shouts of joy and joyful singing and all in all, a jolly good time. I also read that a joyful heart is good medicine and am becoming aware of the idea that when I am filled with God’s Spirit and obedient to Him, I will walk with joy as a natural overflow of His presence in my life. Light and love and beauty and gladness will spill forth from my life as well as from my heart and deeds.

I just can’t imagine how wonderful the celebration banquet is going to be in His presence when we are at the marriage supper of the bride of Christ to the Lamb of God. I see so clearly that God created food and color and music and love and when we bring these into the moments of life, we are showing His reality as much as when we teach theology. I have always celebrated Christmas with our children–especially because it is such a wonderful time and way to bring all sorts of people into our home. It also provided the anchors that make the hearts of the Clarksons tied together. Both of my boys have said they just can’t wait to be “home” and they just can’t wait to be together. I think that even as love covers a multitude of sin, as Peter so adeptly said, celebration covers a multitude of flaws.

I am a flawed individual, but my heart is full of love and somehow, celebration of life has made what I have to offer to my children and to the Lord palatable. Joy, however, is something we have to cultivate. It is out of a heart of thanksgiving and acknowledging God. It is out of a mom heart–that says, “I am so blessed to have you as my children, to have this husband, this home and to have this God who will be faithful to us.”

But, I also love what God has allowed me to know about all of these things. Celebrating that knowledge by bringing others into my home to share my love and His and all of the wonderful ways He has led my path, brings joy to our home. Here’s just a few shots from these wonderful friends and groups in my home this week. And I am off this morning to put another quiche into the oven for a brunch with friends who will also be working side by side with us to encourage the moms who will attend the Colorado conference. These precious ones deserve and need to be spoiled, so we will celebrate this morning!

Have a wonderful day and serve the Lord with gladness!

 
 

A glam shot! My two sweet girls–Sarah and Joy–are in a wonderful
company of Christian actors who are performing Scrooge 12 of 14 nights
in a row and so each day they have to have to roll their hair into
ringlets. They are having so much fun together.

Filed Under: Holidays, Joyful Life, My Books, Our Family, Table Settings

A Sacrifice of Thanksgiving

November 25, 2008 by  5 Comments


“What shall I render to the Lord for all of His benefits toward me?
To thee I will offer a sacrifice of
thanksgiving,
And call upon the name of the Lord,
Oh, may it be in the presence of all His
people;
Praise the Lord!”

Thanksgiving is probably my favorite holiday of the year. It is a time of family gathering, great food, and cozy times, but also a time of nurturing a thankful heart.

APPLE CRANBERRY PIE WITH DUTCH CRUST-YUM 

In general, I do not think thankfulness is a very natural trait. Most often, it seems to me, that people who are grateful are those who have been taught to be thankful–to acknowledge a kindness, to be trained to give words of graciousness to those who have blessed us. Training a child to be thankful is of utmost importance. It is a delightful experience to be around a child who has been trained to thankfulness. “Thank you for  having me over. Thank you for that wonderful meal. Thank you for the ride. Thank you for the lovely gift.” It makes me want to keep giving to that child or friend or family.

I recently had a very humbling experience. 
A sweet mom who is overflowing with pregnancy, and already has 3 wee children in her home,  wrote an email to me and said, “I appreciate so much what you do by having all the women into your home every month and so before I have my baby in three weeks, I want to bring you two meals on two different days, and I want to have your house cleaned for you! I am so thankful for all the ways you have blessed me and taught me and encouraged me. So I didn’t just want to say thanks. I wanted to show thanks to your family.”

When she showed up at the door, she had a wonderful dinner, banana bread for the next morning for breakfast, bags of little extras, and an apology that she was 15 minutes late! As she walked in, Sarah saw how very pregnant she was and when she left, she commented, “Mom, we should be serving her a meal! She is the one who needs some rest and help. But it almost always seems that the busier people are, the more they are able to give. What a sweet mom.”

It was a blessing to me in more ways than I can tell. I do Bible studies and fun nights in my home because I love to do them and I love the precious moms who come. But having her thank me, not just with words, but actions, deeply ministered to me.  It really did mean a lot to me to know that these evenings had meant so much to this precious mom. She took time out of her busy schedule to sacrifice by blessing me. Her sacrifice not only filled our tummies and made it easier from me to have my Bible study (after her friend cleaned my house) but it really touched my heart and gave me a reason to keep doing this.

In the old testament, a sacrifice of thanksgiving was given by people who were to make unleavened cakes and unleavened wafers. It was something given as a praise and thanksgiving to God–acknowledging all that He was and all that He had done. A sacrifice of praise was to take time, intention and forethought.

Similarly, I think that it is of great importance to take time to thank God. But I have also thought that even as the mom greatly pleased me by serving me, that there is no better way to show God our thanks. I have pondered what that meant for Clay and me and the kids not just to thank God but to thank Him with our deeds as well. Slowly God has given me some fun ideas that have helped me feel direction for our family in helping nurture this area.

I think that one of the reasons David is such a picture of a man after God’s own heart, was that he was constantly writing songs about God’s goodness and faithfulness and thanking Him and praising Him. He believed in God’s goodness, even in the midst of a very difficult life. But even more, as a king, He led all of the people in giving God the glory due His name. He called all of his people to sing, play instruments, worship and dance before God–he did it with all of His heart- because of a humble and overflowing heart that truly loved and treasured God. Practical applications to thanksgiving for our children give them patterns that they will practice the rest of their lives.

I must admit that most of my prayers going heavenward are petitions, requests. Yet, I am learning that thanksgiving is an exercise of my character that eventually influences my heart. When I look at my life with thankful eyes, it lifts my heart to see how truly blessed I am and makes all the other issues of my life seem less important. Thanksgiving not only pleases God, but it releases in me all the issues of my life. It gives me a power to be able to believe Him for great things. It causes my soul to soar because it puts me heavenward instead of earthbound. I don’t think it is possible to have a truly thankful heart  and to acknowledge God’s sovereignty over all situations and a bitter heart at the same time–it is one or the other. God would have us be thankful.

On the occasion of my 50th birthday, Sarah made me a lovely gold framed list of 50 attributes that she appreciated about me. I have it in my bedroom and cherish it. Though I live with my shortcomings and weaknesses every day, her verbalizing to me what she loved about me has encouraged me again and again. For every year of my life, I am going to write down something I really am thankful for about the Lord. All of us are doing this as a practice this year. I did it this morning and find that by seeing all of His attributes and provisions and naming them, I am in a whole different frame of mind.

Slowly I am compiling a list of people that I am particularly thankful for. They will receive email cards telling them how much I love and appreciate them. The girls had an idea, too, of each of us picking 2 people who we think are under-appreciated and surprise them with something that will tell them we love them. It has been a growing area in our lives. Yet, over the years, we have noticed that it is those people who write thank you notes, who email life-giving words, who take the time to thank us who seem especially wonderful, because they have learned to be initiators. This area of initiating is a definite sign of good character. I have tried to teach my children that they need to have an internal sense of duty that tells them what is the right thing to do. Practicing doing the right things just because it is right to do helps them to be confident and a blessing, a pattern to follow, for the rest of their lives.

Finally, leaving thank yous on beds when we travel,  surprise notes on pillows at nights, thank you texts on phones, email cards, are the ways that are easily added to busy lives. Giving my girls pretty thank you stationary in their stockings at Christmas, and especially, taking the time to be thankful for them has ended up blessing me, because they have become my best encouragers and most thankful.

Choosing to be thankful and learning to be content will fill your soul with peace and kindness and in the end, you will be happier and more thankful. It is a choice, a habit of practice, but will indeed create in you a more beautiful soul. Practicing what you want to be and what God wants you to be, just because it is right, will always end up blessing you in the end.

May I end by saying how thankful I am for so many of you–you work tirelessly every day, you are going to serve your family and children this week, you are faithful even when no one knows it–but you are indeed of the best and I pray that you will know that all those hours of cooking and loving this week are going deep in the hearts of your children. Have a happy, happy thanksgiving!

Sally

Sally@wholeheart.org

Filed Under: Food, Holidays, Joyful Life, Ministry, Relationships