I Take Joy | Trust in God

If you wait long enough, ….!

April 18, 2013 by Sally 37 Comments

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Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for and hope for and expect the Lord!

So many eras I didn’t think I would live through—-crying babies with colic; ear infections and nocturnal asthma; hysterical fits and fusses and tantrums for never ending years, one day at a time, with a mysterious child with adhd, ocd and odd; marriage struggles between me, a totally romantic, relational woman married to a totally rational, organized man who had to work way too many hours to keep this family afloat; messes, rejections from family for our ideals; 17 moves; loneliness, too little help or support systems; financial crisis; illnesses and hospitalizations and testings never ending; church splits; irrational people; and on and on.

Today, as I look back, I am still here, but God has changed me through it all. I am more patient with everyone, because I see how much I needed patience and still need compassion. I appreciate my faithful husband who has stuck with me through it all and has continued to dream of how we can change the world and write new books and keep this ministry afloat, (amidst him doing 4 loads of laundry last weekend, while I grocery shopped, bought birthday presents–again, and wedding presents for family).

The failures and mistakes I made gave me humility–a gift that allows one to be more appreciative of God’s forgiveness, love and grace. Humility prepares one to minister to others with compassion and sympathy. Few leaders are wise without a dose of failure and having to submit to God’s discipline. Children have a way of humbling mamas.

I see that I appreciate the Lord more, I am less attached to this world, because after many disappointments, I have finally realized in my heart as well as my head, that this world is temporary, the broken place and heaven gives an anchor in the midst of taking our love for this world out of our hands.

I don’t really care as much what other people’s opinion of me is, because I know that I cannot please others and than my audience is the Lord. Only He can make me feel ok and centered with so much potential for failure in the eyes of someone who is looking and wanting to tell me their opinion.

I greatly enjoy my adult children as my best friends. After all of these years, our tastes were developed on the same food, movies, books, travel, spiritual experiences–Clay and I built our own kindred spirits and we all love being together. (Maybe through all the struggles, my efforts at keeping going, training them, reading to them and telling them passionately about the Lord was really accomplishing eternal results in their hearts–but I didn’t always feel like it mattered at the time when they were fussing over things like, “He touched my toe! or His piece of brownie was bigger than mine–and all of these very important issues.) I am pretty relaxed with Joy as a 17 year old in college, because I know the Lord will faithfully guide her, teach her, speak to her and protect her–because I have seen Him be faithful three times before now.

I often didn’t think I could make it through another day, depressed, exhausted, overwhelmed. Feelings were often dark. But I had no choice but to keep putting one foot in front of the other. God knew I could make it. God breathed life into my children’s souls. God taught Clay and me more about unconditional love and grace. As a good Father, the Lord was training and disciplining me, as His own child. Stretching me and building into my life, by using my own children as a soul-shaping tool. He is so good and so faithful. My family and my life became the road to my ultimate joy and freedom from the things I thought would fulfill to the things that truly fulfill. He used them to surgically remove some of the rough edges, expose the immaturity, remold my values and thoughts.

I still have my ups and downs, sometimes sadness and dark thoughts that a fallen world brings, and don’t know how my children’s stories will sort out, but I am more familiar with the process and the Trainer.

So, this week, though still filled with more and different kind of issues, I,

Thank you, my sweet Lord, for your wise ways, for keeping us going, for filling our souls with that which matters. Thank you that you helped me to keep going and going and waiting and waiting. How grateful I am that it is all in your good and capable hands. The sweet memories, the hope that comforts, the work that satisfies, all the things I did not know or understand when we first started. Keep me faithful and hopeful as I continue on this path of your making.

Filed Under: Family, Joyful Life, Our Family, Ponderings, Trust in God

Training my princess

January 23, 2012 by Sally 14 Comments

Carl Larsson

Celebrating last weekend with over 300 moms was quite soul-filling for me. Vibrant conversations, beautiful singing, inspiring speakers–I was so very humbled and blessed to be a part.

Yet, one of the issues that came to mind over and over again as I talked to these women was the issue of training, I want to pass on the picture of training and filling the souls and hearts of children with kingdom principles and truth so that they come alive. It is not a procedure but a relationship. Passing on spirituality is not so much getting the right curriculum, or being “holier” than thou, but it is passing on a life of love, passion for Christ, and goodness that overflows from your own heart. I am reposting an older blog article that gets to the heart of training our “Princesses and Princes” for the role of ruling in their own world someday. Happy Monday.

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Thursday morning was the first day, I think, in a whole year when I had Joy all to myself with everyone else out of the house for a whole day! (Sarah is in Kentucky with a dear friend of mine, Nathan in California, Joel and Clay at work!) We lit candles and sipped our own hot mug of brew in the quiet of my bedroom where no one could find us.

I then had the most wonderful time of reading to her and then teaching her about Abraham and Isaac. We spent almost an hour and half looking at different scripture about him–God calling him to leave his home to follow Him; the promise of a nation outnumbering the sand on the seashore coming from His line–becoming a Father of a nation; his waiting period for the promised son; the birth of Isaac; the sacrifice of Isaac; the passages in Hebrews of him and Sarah living by faith.

“Indeed, If they had been thinking of that country from which they went out (their home!), they would have had opportunity to return. But as it is, they desired a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore, God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.” Hebrews 11:15

We talked and talked about how we are here temporarily and will some day go to a heavenly country. We talked about Abraham giving up his treasure into God’s hands, knowing that He could trust God to hold and keep all that was important to Him–and how indeed God provided the lamb stuck in the bushes–he had already planned to provide for Abraham, but gave Abraham the chance to worship by yielding his treasure and showing God his heart of trust. We talked about how great a nation, throughout history, the Jews became–how God multiplies the work of faith and service we do to make it beyond what we can imagine–just like he did for Abraham. We ended on Romans 12:1-2–the need for us to yield ourselves as a living and holy sacrifice to God which is our spiritual service of worship–just like Abraham did and to be willing to go anywhere, do anything for the privilege of serving God and doing His work on the earth!

I could almost see her little heart swell to the greatness of His calling on her life–I wonder how God will use you? I wonder what it will look like for you to live by faith. Look at how God has blessed and led our family as we have served Him. She then said, “You know, Mom, I used to sometimes worry about the possibility of us moving somewhere for our ministry and wondering if I would be willing to give up my friends, but I gave that to Him last week, knowing that I would rather serve Him and watch Him do great things, than to hold on to my little world and fears.”

I realized again why I love homeschooling–I have the time to have access to my sweet princess’s brain and heart and time to discuss really important things and to love her and nurture her without the hurry and worry that the imposition of a regular schedule might bring. I cherish the times I can train her for the realm in which she will some day rule and bring His light. I love knowing that she and I are such close soul companions because of all the focused time spent without the competition of so many others that she would have if she was in the company of hundreds and hundreds of kids every day. I am preparing to send my children out, and probably away from me, but they will go with hearts and minds filled with stories of heroes who lived differently–boldly, bravely, intentionally for Christ’s purposes–to bring light and beauty and truth to their world.

Joy’s concluding thought was, “I hope I have 12 kids so I can really have a lot of leaders to send from my home. I can’t wait to have my own domain so I can make a place where greatness can live and be made every day as I teach my kids.”

It is all about loving God and passing on the baton of His love to our children. Enjoy your day of training your own royalty to rule over the kingdoms God will give to them. And be sure to enjoy the moment–it will pass more quickly than you know!

Grace and peace!

Sally

Filed Under: Bible Studies, Education, Family, Joyful Life, Mothering, Our Family, Relationships, Trust in God

Filling Your Soul With Love and Grace Divine

March 23, 2011 by Sally 26 Comments

Claude Monet, Woman in the Garden

“I have loved you with an everlasting love, I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” Jeremiah 31:3

I have received thousands of responses to my blogs on child discipline lately. I see how many sweet ones there are who truly want to do the best and be the best for their children. But before I do one more post on child discipline, I just felt I wanted to tell you how very precious you are and how much your own personal life matters.

I awakened this morning with you on my heart. I know there must be many precious moms out there who are reading these articles and are feeling inadequate or guilty or condemned–or just worn out! I have been praying for you all morning.

Motherhood is very precious to the Lord. As a matter of fact, the more I mothered, the more I came to understand Him, His love, His sacrifice, His forgiveness, His patience. Motherhood is not an easy journey. I kept feeling that I needed to have more children so I could do it right at least once!

And yet motherhood is a long journey, a hard and challenging journey, that will require much endurance with grace, much forgiveness, much patience and just a whole lot of energy expended.

You are truly important to God in the midst of it all. He sees you and cares for your dreams and desires. And so I wanted to write a little post just for you.

When I had my first baby, I had never even changed a diaper. I did not know how to hold a baby. I was unprepared for the task. I also did not know how selfish and self-absorbed I was. And I have to admit that over the years, there were many times when I did not feel loving or feel like a good mother or even feel like I wanted to *be* a mother. I was always committed to my children and always committed to loving them, because I knew God wanted me to. But I did not always like them and sometimes that made me feel guilty.

I just put one foot in front of the other because I thought that is what God wanted me to do.

So if you feel that you are not a “natural” mother, or you enjoy doing things outside your home, or you have other ambitions, please do not condemn yourself. I felt all of those feelings and had to learn how to balance the different pulls on my life. But God has loved me and led me through it all.

I know that there are so many of you precious ones with deep scars. Perhaps you came from an angry family, where you were criticized or rejected. Or maybe you were ignored and you still wish someone would notice you and love you deep inside in those places that only you can feel.

Many of you made some bad choices morally that have deeply injured your own heart. Or you have a passive and indifferent or mean and abusive husband.

You are not defined by any of these things–not by what people have said to you, not by your flaws (we all have them), and not by your past failures or present difficulties. God loves you so very much. God is with you. God is your champion.

We read that when He looked out on the multitudes, He had compassion on them because they were like sheep without a shepherd. Jesus sees our needs. He loves us. He cares for how each of you feel deep in your heart.

You are so very precious to God. He is on your side. He will be your warrior God in all the battles in your home. He will help you and defend you and pour out His unconditional love on you. He is the source of your strength and joy. Nothing can separate you from His love. Romans 8

There is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1

The only way we can truly make it in this life productively is to tend to the garden of our own souls. The only way you can be a loving mother or friend is to have your soul filled with the deep, unchanging, unconditional love of God.

I love the picture above. I picture my soul as a garden that must be tended and cultivated and watered. If my own soul is healthy, then all who draw from my soul, will receive true nurture and strength. However, I do not know of any great women who have not been very intentional about cultivating and building themselves into godly women. They invested purposefully to become who they are.

A wise woman builds her house, but it starts with a plan!

You may find criticism from the world. But in Christ, you will find love, deep, abiding, unconditional love and all that you need for your task. But you must choose to invest your time wisely.

So what are some ways to fill your own soul so that you may have strength and love to give?

1. Surround yourself with good and godly friends.

I once heard a speaker say that he will do anything to put himself in the company of people who make Him want to love God more, who make Him want to be a better person–who inspire Him. But that he would avoid all of those who spread poison or gossip or discouragement as much as possible.

I have a friend, Phyllis, who I know will always point me to God. Just being with her is like being in the presence of the Lord’s encouragement, because she walks with Him and points me to him. Gwen is such a friend, and Deb, Shelley, Lynn, Beth and Sarah and Joy, ……….I gather these friends over the years and invest in them because they invest in me.

Find those friends, challenge a friend to be a prayer partner, to study a book together, to meet with you on a regular basis.

2. Spend time every day with the Lord. Find books, resources, people who can help you with this. (Go though the Psalms and circle or underline every promise or character quality of God. Read one chapter of John or Matthew a day and write down one lesson you have learned. Read through Philippians and note all the ways Paul tells us to follow Jesus.)

3. Clean out your soul on a regular basis–get rid of the rubbish that has kept you from experiencing God’s love. (If we confess our sin, he is faithful and just to forgive us from our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.) Don’t hang on to bitterness or condemnation–it will poison you. I have a friend, Sarah Mae, who is dear to me as though she were a daughter. She has recently published an ebook called Core Lies, that she is offering for free. We must rid our hearts from lies that would keep us from experiencing the generous love of God.

4. Surround yourself with books, blogs, people who feed your mind on truth, who draw you to become a better self. There are many, many women in my life who do that to me. But I wanted to point you to three of my favorites.

I love these women because they have chosen to have integrity in their lives when no one was looking. They have invested thousands of hours in the presence of God. They have chosen to love and serve Him, to always turn in the direction of faith. I know they are not perfect, but they hold fast to a Faithful God who carries them. They are also seasoned women who have chosen to faithfully love and serve their children, and husbands, even amidst challenging times. They have weathered life and from that weathering, have garnered stories of His faithfulness. Feed on their life-giving words. I do so love these women.

Brenda Nuland– a mother of two grown children, who cultivates life, beauty, goodness and faithfulness in her home.Brenda always encourages me, feeds my soul and gives me loyal friendship.

Elizabeth Foss–a sweet mother of 9 children, whose devotion to God, gentle mothering of her children, and great thoughts always challenge me. She is humble and loyal as a friend and has learned to persevere with grace.

Ann Voskamp-an artist with words and photography, who deeply cherishes her precious Lord and wants to sing his messages into the lives of those in her pathway. Her gentle, humble words are always filled with grace that she found from walking closely with Him.

5. Spend time in nature–his workshop. When I see the artistry of God, and rest in the glory of the canopy of His beauty, I find great peace. Creation was made for us. He designed the stars for us to understand His vastness–His strength and ability to be bigger than us, to show us His power. He designed color, flowers, mountains, waterfalls, snow, rain, to show us His design. When I invest time in His works of art, I am inspired to reflect His art and beauty in my home as a picture of His reality in an otherwise dark world. Creation nurtures my soul when I take time to observe it.

6. Restore, relax, recreate. Young moms need a break.(and old moms and moms of teens, and……..) They need sleep. Sometimes grumpiness or depression goes away with just a couple of good nights of sleep or time away with a friend. Moms need to have a friend who understands them and still loves them! They need to laugh and lighten up. Cultivate times of breaks in your life, times of just getting away. Don’t always be serious–it is exhausting.

Our bodies need a sabbath rest. I take my tea time every day with a candle, book or magazine. I collect videos and movies and series of stories that delight my soul. I surround myself with music everywhere–at home, in the car, at dinner, when I am in a plane. I love rhythms and movement. I make time for cherished friends. I make fun for myself with my children so that we can just laugh and play and store up humor–everyone needs a break. (Read my daughter, Sarah’s blog post from a couple of days ago–Christians need to learn how to lighten up and have fun.)

These precious ones are not just public figures to me, but in the privacy of friendship, offer such grace, humility, love and always make me want to love Him more.

This blog is way too long, but the point is, you are important. Your emotional, spiritual and physical health matters to God. If you cherish your soul and become a good steward of your needs, you will be stronger for your journey of life and more ready to meet its demands. But you are the one who must plan how to endure with grace and beauty. You must create a plan that best suits your puzzle of life. Grace and beauty and peace in the midst of it all.

Filed Under: Art, Beauty, Friends, Home, Joyful Life, Lifegiver, Mothering, Music, Nature, People, Ponderings, Relationships, Simplicity, Tea, Trust in God

Parenting: It all starts with your view of God

March 21, 2011 by Sally 38 Comments

Michelangelo–God at creation

Starting with the right foundations

If there was one legacy I wish I could leave to other women, it would be to help them think more Biblically. When a woman knows scripture–the whole counsel of scripture, not just verses here and there taken out of context. But gaining a Biblical understanding from Genesis to Revelation, then she has more confidence and ease in her walk with God. (It is also why I hope to give a good bit of my life in the next years to our leadership intensives where women will learn a little of Biblical instruction, foundations, prayer, Bible study–to follow God in our lives as we serve and love Him. More on that later this month.)

God makes it clear throughout scripture that his priority for us is to know Him and love Him with our whole heart and mind.

“Let not a wise man boast of his wisdom, let not a rich man boast of his riches, let not a mighty man boast of his might, but let him who boasts, boast of this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the God who exercises lovingkindness and righteousness on the earth for I delight in these things.” Jeremiah 9: 23-24

And, “Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it.” Psalm 127

And so the starting point for any arena in our lives must be God–our worship of Him and knowledge of Him and obedience–a heart that wants to please God.

So, let me begin by praying for all who read this today. “Lord, I pray that each one who reads these blog articles will be led by you. I pray you will provide them with insight, skill, love, wisdom and the understanding of what it means to be filled with your Spirit and to walk by faith in this journey of motherhood. And bless them with strength, joy and a sense of affirmation in their great calling as parents. I come to you in the precious name of Jesus. Amen”

I do not pretend to have all of the answers to all of the questions that people may have. I feel even reticent to become any kind of an authority, and pray only that I may shed a little insight on what I have learned through the years, by walking this journey with God. I also do not want to place any unnecessary burden upon moms who are doing their best, seeking to find wisdom and can feel like failures, as though “It is too late. I have already messed up my children.”

God is the God of second chances and His whole nature is to love and redeem. So, know that He is in your home, He loves those who seek Him and obey Him and He is a God of compassion and will work in and through your life.

(Even as a Father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him. Psalm 103: 13)

And, of course, I am not anxious to attract lots of comments from women who want to tell me why I am wrong or why I do not understand scripture.

But, in the spirit of Titus 2, and my own stewardship of what God has graciously taught me over the years, I write these articles with much trepidation and dependence on Him. But I do think that God would have all of us women, in the spirit of Titus 2, pass on truths that we have learned so that other women may have more direction and help in the shaping of their families and the loving of their husbands. I longed for a mentor when I was young and so hope, so for the sake of encouragement and to please Him, I hope I might shed some light on this path of parenting.

It all starts with your view of God

Ultimately, so much of what I lived and what I know to be true, I learned by reading scripture, pondering it, studying it, seeking to really know God and walking with Him. Pondering Christ, who is the perfect reflection of God, according to Hebrews 1.

As many of you know, I have often said, “In the absence of Biblical conviction, people will go the way of culture.”

Women will go the way of their church culture, media culture, family culture, peer culture–they will follow whoever is leading, unless they have developed their own convictions. We will listen to other voices if we have not learned to discern the voice of God. The problem with this kind of approach is that it leads to whims, to whatever way the cultural wind is blowing.

And so, when it comes to child training, if people have not had the opportunity to think Biblically or to study the word of God, and about what God is like, they will look to others for “truth.” Most people desire specifics–just give me the rule, the formula, the law, as we want this process to be easy and predictable.

Please know that I am not trying to offend anyone. I want to be of encouragement and help. Yet, I have noticed, too, that sometimes, those who are most emphatic and confident about formulas and rules and laws about child training are those who have young children, who have not lived a whole life-time of raising children to maturity. It was interesting to me how many comments I had from older women (under my article first time obedience, really) who said that they wish they had known the ways of grace based parenting because of the negative effects it had on their children and how much it incurred anger and rebellion in their children.

Then often times, good hearted parents, will just take the opinion of a writer or speaker or authority, who says some emphatic things about a subject and uses a few proof texts to add support. What this speaker says, becomes law and rules and a formula to follow. Period.

And then, sweet, devoted women live by the rules and feel guilty if they do not follow the rules to a t, as though they are failing their children if they do not conform to the sound bites and laws of the speaker they are following–the speaker’s voice is in their head.

However, in the Christian life, even in parenting, God gave us a brain to think, a conscience to nudge our hearts, the Holy Spirit who lives inside of us to guide us. All He asks is that we live by faith in him dependence on Him. And yes, I think through this process, God has given a mom intuition and a mom’s instinct for what is best for her child. God always loves to lead us and work through us by faith in relationship to Him and what He is impressing us to do, within the beautiful design of our femininity and womanhood. That is why it is crucial that we are spending time in His presence and seeking to build a foundation of conviction on scripture and knowledge of God.

And so begins a series of articles addressing some of the issues about child discipline that many have asked me to write.

Your parenting philosophy all begins with your view of God.

I know I will frustrate many of you by taking so long to explain the foundations of our philosophy, as you would rather me tell you the specifics of how I did it and why, by God’s grace, I was able to raise 4 children who are obedient and respectful to us and who love God and are seeking to serve Him in and through their lives. But, my own parenting of my four very different children was a process of seeking wisdom, studying scripture, listening to God, following other wise people. It was a process of relationship and love with Him, not following the formulas that it seemed most of my peers were following. We went against the grain of the culture we were surrounded by, and yet found the wonderful presence of God in our home as we sought Him.

But, I feel that one of the most foundational starting points, is that all of us see our children through a grid. A grid is the lens through wich you see life. And if we can define that grid, then it will determine how we behave in relationship to our children.

Do you see your children through a grid of them being a blessing from God? (psalm 127)

Do you see the fruit of the womb as a reward? (psalm 127)

How does one treat blessings and gifts?

We read in Mark 10: 16 that Jesus took the little children into His arms and blessed them. Do you bless your children and see that as a part of being Jesus to them? He said of little children, “of such is the kingdom of God.”

Jesus also said, “Woe to the one who causes the leasts of these little ones to stumble.” What would cause a little one to stumble?

So today, I leave you with this question?

How do you see your children? What informs your mind when you look upon their sweet faces? Do you see them through the eyes of Jesus? Do you focus on them as someone to police or correct–or someone to love and serve, understand, protect, love and instruct?

As in all great work, it requires so very much time, effort, work, fortitude, faith and patience. But raising Godly children is of the most important work in eternity.

Filed Under: Child Training, Children, Family, Lifegiver, Mothering, Parenting, Trust in God

Saturday moments: Awhirl with life and thoughts

March 19, 2011 by Sally 8 Comments

up at 4:21 and could not sleep.

Quiet time by candlelight, so as not to awaken Clay with the light of the living room reflecting in His eyes through our bedroom door.

Concentrating, meditating on the Lord who is with me (I will be with you always, the Lord who lives to make intercession for us; I have loved you with an everlasting love.) Letting His love fill my heart. Looking at the lovely soft candle-light and remembering Him as the light of the world–asking to let His light shine into my heart.

Reading: “Oh God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; My soul thirsts for you, my flesh yearns for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.” Psalm 63:1

I am a tangle of emotion. Sadness is deep inside for things lonely and unanswered. My heart seeks that place of contentment for now, as I want Him to know my gratefulness for all He has answered and all He has been to me over the years. I spend time worshipping Him.

Going early with Sarah for coffee before she and Joy go to play rehearsal for our church’s Easter production.

Eating homemade granola for breakfast (3 + cups organic whole oats, 3/4 cup slivered almonds, 3/4 cup pecans, 1/4 cup maple syrup and oil, a sprinkle of brown sugar to taste 1/4 to 1/2 cup, a teaspoon of salt, cranberries or apricots or raisins and baked for 1 hour, 15 minutes at 250 degrees–stirring every 15 minutes) with Greek Yoghurt.

Making Cottage pies and soda bread for Joy’s belated St. Patrick’s Day party at our home tonight. Putting together another car scavenger hunt for teams of friends based on Ireland and Patrick and celtic folklore, a quiz about famous Irish people and history and games.

Joel, music and creativity bubbling up all over.

Reserving seats on a plane for Joy and me to fly to Boston to see Joel honored in his concert in Boston. How did my dear little boy, gentle Joel, who would squish next to me in my overstuffed chair in the mornings, with his knees folded in front of him, tall up to his chin and tee shirt pulled over to his ankles, saying, “Mama, let’s be close and talk,” grow up to become the composer of the year with two other men, with professional musicians performing his string quartet and 4 movements of a piece, in a live concert, and so very sophisticated and confident? He makes me so very delighted inside and brings smiles to me over the phone. Such a loyal, encouraging companion, so thoughtful, full of integrity. Such potential lies in the depths of these precious ones entrusted into our hands. Music and graciousness always flowed out of his soul, but I could never have imagined….

Reviewing and reading several chapters of Clay’s newest version of Educating the Whole Hearted Child today, as he wrapped it up yesterday. Observing what an insightful writer he is of life-changing ideas. Pondering the ideals we embarked upon 27 years ago, the first time we spoke about homeschooling to any parents. Seeing the fruit after all these years–that what we gave our lives to was true after all–and to see His hand of faithfulness and grace through the seasons, as I reread and ponder our shared ideals and dreams so long ago launched in faith. (out May 1!)

Knowing there will be a couple of cups of tea or coffee tucked into my moments and maybe even a nap, since getting up at 4:21 may not take me through the day.

I must write Him a thank you note from my heart. Grateful for His faithfulness, His strength and joy in the midst of each step of our journey. Acknowledging His call to remain faithful today, and each day ahead, only by His empowering to keep going. Looking this day for the fingerprints of His present love. Seeking to love Him back.

Filed Under: Beauty, Children, Ponderings, Prayer, Trust in God

Sunday Pondering ~ Our Mighty God

January 30, 2011 by Sally 2 Comments

The Lord on high is mightier
Than the noise of many waters,
Than the mighty waves of the sea.
Psalm 93:4

How I love the ocean–listening to the thunder, grasping the power! This is in my mind as I go to California–to ponder these thoughts.

Grace to your Sunday!

Psalm 93:4

Filed Under: Joyful Life, Nature, Ponderings, Trust in God

Grace undeserved

January 10, 2011 by Sally 11 Comments

Love a man, even in his sin, for that love is a likeness of the divine love and is the summit of love on earth.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Life in the contemporary is standing against my ability to be mature all the time. The pace of life, the interruptions, the lack of time by myself to become centered, and the constant flow of food and messes are the hardest for me or most stressful for my personality, I must say. Looking back at this post from a few years ago, I see that often the struggle with myself is still pretty much the same. But even as I see the beauty of His hands all around me, and His grace happens every day, so I know His grace for my frail humanity is constant and new every morning. Great is his faithfulness.

Everything is a rush and hurry and then a wait and see. Yesterday, I found myself sinning far too easily. After three attempts to confirm some seats on a plane going overseas, I finally got the auto response to go almost to the point of confirming seats, after thirty minutes of frustration. I did not find it humorous that a very soothing, recorded voice was placed precisely at one point of choosing an arbitrary host of numbers, to comfort me—though I know a machine cannot really feel emotion. “I’m sorry! I didn’t understand you. It must be my fault.”(Can a machine be faulted for making mistakes and can it feel sorry Does it really care for my frustration???)

Finally, a real and very surly woman answered my phone call. I gave her all the right numbers for our ticket and then told her I wanted to be sure to secure seats on our overseas flight, as the seat numbers were deleted from the confirmation I had received on the Internet.

“You cannot secure seats until the morning of the flight. It is company policy that once we book our flight more than 45%, we cannot give out anymore seats. And, by the way, I am the supervisor, and there is no one higher than me that you can talk to!” (Obviously, she had had a difficult day and didn’t even want to have to address the fact that there was no one higher up that I could talk to—and we had only just begun our conversation. Could there have been a hard phone call before she ever got to me?)

“I have never heard of an overseas flight where I couldn’t get my seat assignment. I am traveling with three of my children and would like to sit close together,” I said in my most authoritative voice.

“If your children are over 10, they can obviously sit anywhere on the plane by themselves, and I can’t guarantee that they won’t all be in different rows. You will just have to wait until you get to the gate. Obviously you haven’t traveled very much. It is always done this way.”

I raised to my full-bodied stature at this point, even though she couldn’t see my shock or my rising at such a statement. After all, I had been traveling overseas for over thirty years and had never come across this particular problem or such a definitively closed airline operator.

In a very irrational and immature moment, I asked the woman, “If I call back, is there a good chance I won’t have to talk to you again?!” Well, I had been on the phone a long time and she wasn’t very nice to me and I did have a hard day and……..

Immediately, when I had hung up the phone, remorse set in. The accusatory finger in my mind said, “Well, that was real mature! Bet you made that lady feel real good. I can’t believe you are a serious, committed Christian, and you actually talked to someone like that! The Lord is so disappointed in you. Probably He is eventually going to quit using you in influencing others, because you just keep blowing it!”

I must admit, when my own life is stressful, and I have had a hard day, I want sympathy, kindness, forgiveness, grace. I want someone to understand that I am doing my best and to tell me it is ok. It is what I want from God. It is what I want from my husband. It is what I want from my children.

My heart became open to the Spirit’s prompting. Just happened, my morning reading came across this verse: “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”
Now this much I already knew and agreed with.

But the context of the verse was further explained, “Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jew or Greek or the church of God. Even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good, but the good of many in order that they may be saved.” I Cor. 10: 31-32

So, I glorify God, not by knowing all the right theological answers, or by keeping a perfect house, or having quiet times every day, but by glorifying God by seeking the good of everyone else–even a stressed out operator.

My sweet children have taught me this. They see through false piety. They know what it means to be fair. They comment on other adults in our lives who speak loudly about piety but whose lives scream loudly of hypocrisy. But, they are also very willing to forgive.

Joy placed her arm around me and sat sweetly in my lap. At almost 12,(now almost 16) it is too rare of an occurrence, (but she still does sit in my lap on occasion), but oh so cherished. “Mom, we’ll get some seats. Don’t you worry. It always works out.” A kiss on my cheek and then she was gone. Suddenly I saw God’ s glory in an unsuspecting angel in my own home, who chose to give me grace, and then I felt He, the one from whom patience and love was given their meaning, had gently restored me to himself.

Filed Under: Family Trips, Ponderings, Travel, Trust in God

Is the lamp of your soul filled?

December 30, 2010 by Sally 3 Comments

January is usually a challenging time in the lives of many people. The anticipation of the holidays is over, there are messes to be cleaned, and lots of cold weather and dark days ahead. From times past, I know that it helps me every year to refocus and get a new perspective in order to make it through the long winter months with more grace.

I wish you were here today, the flurries of snow are so lovely as it peacefully dances through the air and falls softly. It is so white, so pure, so wonderful. It reminds me of the gentleness of God’s word and the beauty of it as it fills our soul. That is exactly the way I feel now as I ponder our morning devotions where we discussed the virgins that didn’t bring enough oil for their lamps.

¹ “At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. ² Five of them were foolish and five were wise. 3 The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. (Mathew 25: 1-3)

Some of the virgins were called wise and some were called foolish. Why?

Because they had oil? Well, partially but more because they had thought ahead to the priorities in life. They didn’t let things in life distract them from the truly pressing, the truly important, the true priorities. The wise virgins took the time to put oil in their lamps–to be ready to meet the bridegroom.

What does it mean for us to be ready to meet Him? To see Him face to face? How does that play itself out in the warp and woof of our home life? There are times in our lives when we definitely get distracted by dirty rooms, meals to prepare and oh yes, definitely laundry! But, are these the things that put oil into our souls? Likely not.

However, focusing on the Savior that is in the manger and on the cross will definitely fill our soul and guide our hands to the priorities of a time to visit with God every day, a time to talk to our children about why they are created in God’s image and maybe some help in how they can walk that out today. Maybe it is time in prayer for the neighbor, friend who is mourning, or family member that feels so alone and misunderstood.

All of our busy-ness will be in vain if it is not in preparation to see Him, to celebrate Him in our homes, to ready all of our children to put Him as the highest priority as we await that wonderful day when He will come back to the earth. God wants us to be ready and anticipating His coming.

The wise virgins were ready–they had faithfully prepared to see their Savior face to face. When we are in readiness the priorities are a lot more clear and our steps are so much more sure. So, as January approaches, evaluate your life in light of this wonderful little story. Take some time today to make sure you have the oil you need for your lamp and you too will be wise.

Filed Under: Bible Studies, Child Training, Lifegiver, Ponderings, Trust in God

The Best Gift I Can Give

December 16, 2010 by Sally 7 Comments

Investing in your children for eternity ~ prayer
George Romney ~ Lady Hamilton praying

“The eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,

and His ears are attentive to their cries.” Psalm 34:15

Babies are dependent on us for our very existence–our milk, our protection, our love and words and care, daily, every moment. When they cry, we, like God, are attentive and respond. It is the way we know their needs.When we respond to them with tenderness and an overflowing of our love, deep in their beings, they begin to understand that God is one who responds to their cries.

God has designed them to be fragile so that we can put an imprint of God’s very hands and love and grace into the molding places of their hearts and minds, so that in “feeling” our love, they become predisposed to know and believe in His love and touch when they hear the stories of Him. Our constant service to them and pouring out of our lives when they are tiny, become a familiar pattern to their brains to understand His generous love, sacrifice and redemption.

But as our children grow, they become more able to stand on their own feet, to think for themselves, to begin making decisions that will have consequences. When we are young and our children are young, we have some sense that we are in control of their lives–that what we do and how we control them will determine what they will become.

However, the older my children become, I realize that apart from God’s working deep in their souls, they will not follow His course of righteousness. I cannot control their lives, circumstances, or inform their decisions. There is a dark world of temptation, idolatry, despair, immorality at calling to them at every point. But I am not left helpless or hopeless. I can have a big impact on their lives and can help shoulder their burdens every day.

Over the years, I slowly grew into an understanding that unless the Lord stirs their hearts, quickens their minds to the scripture they have learned to love in my home, they will be sorely tempted to go the way of the world. And so, now, though I am in constant communication with my older children and encouraging and listening, I know that my biggest work in their lives will be before the throne of God.

Even as I see Jesus so often praying the whole night, and read that He prayed for Peter, and look at the loving, tender words of prayer in John 17, I know, too that I must model my life after His. The real work in my children’s souls, the fingertips that will mold and shape their hearts, is that of the Holy Spirit. My work is to mysteriously engage with Him before God’s throne, and it is there that the life of my children will bloom afresh. I share with you a small portion from one of my books:

The more time I spend with my Father in prayer, the better prepared I will be to help my children. And even more important, the more I can rest in the Lord knowing, by faith, that my children are in his hands. When I can trust in God’s providence, draw upon his grace, join in the spiritual battle through prayer, and praise his name, all the other things I do as a mother seem to pale in significance. The more I grow as a mother, the more I grow convinced that the most important impact I will ever have on my children will be through my prayers for them. ~ Seasons of a Mother’s Heart p. 201

“Therefore, brethren, since we have confidence to enter the holy place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which He inaugurated for us through the veil, that is, His flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.” Hebrews 10:19-22

What are you praying for your children? Write down one thing for each child and commit to approaching God’s throne in confidence daily until Christmas Day. May the Lord bless you as you give your children the best gift ever ~ your prayers!

Filed Under: Family, Mothering, Prayer, Trust in God

An Unexpected Adventure on my day with the Lord!

November 19, 2010 by Sally 17 Comments

Piles of snow, loss of pathway, and no one to help.

Thanks so very much to all of you who prayed for me yesterday. I have been quite blessed and am so excited about what the Lord has put on my heart. Your words and well wishes were of great encouragement to me and made me feel so very special and loved. I appreciate your taking the time to fb me and to write comments.

One of the reasons I am seeking the Lord for guidance at this point, is that at 57, I feel keenly that I need to make the next years of my life count. I do not have endless years of ministry and speaking ahead–but a limited time, realistically. And with my last child graduating from high school in May, I have been impressed by the Holy Spirit to really become intentional about my plans and priorities.

If you have read any of my books, you know that God have given to me an adventuresome heart. Many stories and lessons have come from walking, hiking, climbing mountains and getting lost! Yesterday, I was enjoying a wonderful quiet time where my heart was being filled with excitement for what is ahead. It seemed pretty clear what I needed to drop and what I needed to focus on in my life. (more on that next week)

After a couple of hours, I decided to talk a walk outside, as I love to walk and it provides a great time for me to think and pray and clear my mind. There is a small lake up from where I am staying. It has a pathway around it and our family has walked it many times. As a matter of fact, I walked it just three days ago by myself one morning.

So, I climbed the hill to the little lake, and began to walk around it, looking for some familiar benches where we have shot family pictures and sat many times before. Three to four feet of snow had piled up in mounds in many places just from the previous 3 days of snow. I thought I knew this path very well and so took off in the direction of what I thought was my pathway around the lake. However, as I ventured into the obscured path, I found myself deeper and deeper in snow. What had started out as sinking down 3-4 inches in snow, eventually turned into a foot of snow. Stomping my feet 12 inches down, falling with each step became very grueling.

I kept thinking I was on the path and would find a cleared out place to walk just a few feet ahead. But, eventually, I found myself in snow that was over my knees with each step. I had looked back after about 10 minutes to go back, but it looked like the clearest path was just ahead. Finally, I realized I had walked deep into the woods, as I could not see a path or the lake. It all happened little by little. All the while I was thinking I was going a familiar way.

Now, I hate to admit it, but I had no gloves on. (I know all of you moms who prepare for everything–I know what you are thinking.) But, I had walked this a million times and the sun was out and I have hot little hands, so I don’t generally wear gloves outside unless it is below freezing. But, I found myself falling every few steps (when you are sinking down below your knees in jeans with every step, the awkwardness of the snow and uneven ground underneath, caused me to fall numerous times.

Because I have lived in the mountains so long, I knew that I had to hurry and keep going as fast as I could to find a way out, as the colder and wetter one gets, the more danger of exhaustion and frost bite and inability to keep going. I was deeply out of breath, keeping a constant pace and climbing towards what I thought was a flat trail.

Finally, I found some footsteps where someone else had gotten off the train. Though each footstep was about 18 inches deep, it was a sure foundation from the packed snow and gave me the steadiness I needed to keep going forward. Of course the Lord was speaking to me the whole time.

“When you are searching for a trial in a difficult climb, it is always easier if you can follow someone else’s footsteps who have gone before you to lead the way.”

It seemed to me a paradigm of so many moms. Going on a pathway that is against the storms of culture, but without anyone to show them the way. I have forged this idealistic trail of life, to raise godly, moral, educated children in a culture that is challenging at every point. God had step by step taken me through the rough and dangerous turns and twists of a hostile culture and had been faithful to, by His grace and guidance, allow me to raise Whole Hearted children, healthy, alive and vibrant in their young adulthood.

The Lord really seemed to underline how much of a stewardship I had to be the footsteps in front of moms who need to find the way to go. I need to continue giving my life to help, to encourage and to show the way in the midst of all the cultural storms. Of course this was added to all He had been speaking to my heart earlier that morning when all of you sweet friends had been praying for me.

Finally after an hour and 40 minutes, I was able to climb up onto an abandoned ski trail. It was being prepared for skiing but was not opened yet. I saw flashing lights ahead of a ski patrol and so I walked about a quarter of a mile towards the light.

Finding 3 ski patrol staff, I explained my story, and they commented, “Oh yeah, I heard they hadn’t cleared the pathway yet and had piled snow against the former trail. It was too much snow in two days to clear.”

“Why don’t you hop on the back of my4 wheeler and I will ride you up to the top of the mountain and take you back over to the place you are staying.”

Of course she had gloves, a helmet and a snow suit. I had my coat, soaked jeans and was out for a leisurely walk with no gloves. And so she began to jet up the mountain. It was actually gorgeous and thrilling, when I stopped the beating of my pounding heart from overcoming my feat of bouncing off. We climbed all the way up to the top of the ski trail and over the mountain to the other ski slope. She, used to the mountain, was speeding over bumps and twists. I prayed, “Please don’t let me die now, Lord. Clay and the kids would never forgive me.”

After about 5 minutes, I began to enjoy myself and looked out over the sparkling snow and beauty of the sun shining through the trees. Again, the Lord reminded me what an adventure He had taken me on throughout my life, and yet how faithful He had been to provide and to help me along the way.

And so, I came home, took a very tall and hot bath, and sat down for my final alone hour. God poured out all sorts of dreams, ideas and ideals to follow in the next phase of my life to come. But, my day had been a little more interesting than I ever imagined it would be.