Renoir You may have tangible wealth untold;
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be –
I had a Mother who read to me. Strickland Gillian
Richer than I you can never be –
I had a Mother who read to me. Strickland Gillian
“Give me a man or woman who has read a thousand books and you give me an interesting companion.”Anne Rice
Children are pre-wired by God to long for knowledge and skill. It is why the average 4 year old asks 100 questions a day. Children also thrive when they are given grand resources in their souls–a vocabulary worthy of thinking great thoughts, grasping interesting ideas, discovering wisdom and knowledge.
One of the greatest ways we can love our children is by cultivating in them a love for learning, cultivating their intellect, and giving them a broad base of education. Research widely acclaims, in every venue of research, that a child who is read to will have a larger capacity for solving problems, a greater vocabulary, a greater ability to solve problems, is more socially adjusted, tests better, is more likely to become a leader, and the list goes on and on. This great habit of life is not developed by saying to your children, “Read!”
It is a habit that a wise woman cultivates at every possible moment. It must be planned, practiced, cultivated, acted on–do not think that anything else can replace this wonderful gift you can give to your children! There is nothing more miraculous for the soul or to draw children to your ideas of faith, than to invest long hours of reading profoundly together!
When we invest in our children’s intellect and mental prowess, we give them a confidence and skill in life that will serve them all the days of their lives. But, developing reading as a delight and as a life-long habit requires choices. We must limit media for ourselves and for them–as they pick up what we model.
But we must also, at the earliest age, pick up our babies and hold them in our laps and talk and read to them if we want to pass on this skill and habit and mental strength. A reader does not just happen by chance, it is a cultivated habit, a discipline of life. And if you want to give your children a broad and deep soul, reading to them and spending time engaging in stories is an invisible gift that will serve them the rest of their lives.
People have asked me, how did you raise a child who was able to score a perfect score on one of Harvard’s entrance tests? I held Sarah in my lap with little picture books from the time she was a wee baby. I would point to Richard Scary pictures of toys or bodies or animals and would say the word and the sound the animal made and she would point to them and say the words. I read sweet picture books every morning and every night. (love Eloise Wilkin as an Illustrator as all of her paintings are beautiful and family friendly, so I collected these books.)
I used interesting voices and dramatized and laughed and boomed whenever a story required it. By the time she was 3 years old, reading with me was a delight and we had read together hundreds and hundreds of hours. She loved cuddling up with her blankie or a small cup of her favorite juice or drink or just sitting in my lap and it became a bonding time for us as we shared stories and characters and life and interests together.
Next came Joel and he just squished in with us. Even Nathan, (positive peer pressure, you know–if the other kids did it, he followed suit), and reading out loud became a habit.
We must observe that God told us about himself through story–all the old testament stories are about real people who captivate our imagination. Jesus told stories constantly to teach a lesson. And so stories of great people, interesting histories, epoch or interesting or humorous tales, captivated them for hours,
I think if you asked all of my children what were the most defining habits that tied our family together, all of them would say “Reading together.”
John 1 tells us that Jesus was the “Word.” We were made to people of words. Words give us truth, knowledge, ideas, character, patterns for life, inspiration, companionship, conviction, encouragement, intelligence. There is no end to what I could say about the importance of words and their connection to all of the rest of our lives.
How do we develop a love for words? By talking and reading and engaging in great ideas and discussing great ideas. Many women I know are planning their children’s year and measuring much of what they hope to accomplish by activities they are going put in their children’s schedule and by classes their children will take and by curriculum on which they will spend all of their resources.
Many people ask me all the time, “What curriculum did you use to determine that your children would become academically excellent and score so well on their tests and get into such good colleges and get those scholarships? How did you give your children Biblical convictions so that they love the Lord and want to serve Him?”
First, let me say, it is all by God’s grace. He resides in our home fully with life, truth, and dominion. But, the way God worked through our days was through reading, reading, reading–discussing each and every night, morning, noon and afternoon. Baskets of books everywhere–in all of the rooms, even the bathrooms!
I determined that I would expose my children to the best and wisest authors and minds and stories that would build the foundation of their souls and that would give them truth (the Word) and that would inspire them to build a world view that provided for them to want to invest their lives in the history of this world for His kingdom. We read hundreds if not thousands of books. We discussed truth. We cherished wisdom and ideas and models throughout history. We made reading the priority and giving our children a love for reading and knowing a foundation for their lives.
How did Sarah become such a wonderful writer? By being read to profoundly. How did Joel do so well on his essays for all college entrance and get such high test scores? By being read out loud to! Why was Nathan compelled to write a book? Why did Joy start a blog? (her most recent one here–about books and about loving the Bible)
Because they loved learning, reading, thinking, teaching and sharing wisdom as a natural consequence of living in a world full of ideas and words. Not rocket science–just wisdom.
But, if you really want to give them this profound gift of love, you must stop all of the other things you are doing and read every day–every day–every day. If you wait until you have time, you will not do it–it must be a part of your rhythm of life and a priority.
Do not fill your schedules with unnecessary activities and lists of textbooks and unnecessary busy work–it will wear you out and demotivate your children.
Instead, delight in great stories, teach the word passionately. Greatly value and treasure words and ideas and history in front of your children so that they will fall in love with language and knowledge. (Of course it goes without saying–limit media to a reasonable amount–almost none when they are little and only a bit more when they are older until they are of age to be responsible for themselves.) You cannot expect children to fall in love with reading and thinking if they have media as an option all the time for babysitting them.
We still read outloud to our children. Sarah and Nate spent several hours a week this summer reading a several hundred page book together just for fun when they weren’t working. No, they are not nerds. They are healthy, redblooded, fun, contemporary, highly convicted children. But they learned this habit of sharing great stories together and it became a part of their friendship and a part of their pleasure.
It started with our family culture–magazines in every corner of the house–creation science, nature, history, beautiful ones, captivating illustrations. Book baskets in every room–picture books, art books, history books, etc. Reading every day for an hour in the afternoon–a habit we still keep. And many other things.
So, be sure, no matter what else you do, in your planning to plan a great list of wonderful books to cozy up and read to your children all together. Make it a daily ritual. Cuddle up on the couch. Use great voices. Get excited. Pick exciting captivating stories. ……..and and and and!
If we lose the gift of reading in this generation, we will lose the ability to reason, to understand God’s greatness, to think well, to have convictions. We must keep literacy up! One of the most important works of our lives. If children do not learn to love to read, they will not become readers of the Bible–the best words. They will love reading if you read outloud to them and cherish them and celebrate great stories together with them in peace and joy.
“We read to know we are not alone!” C. S. Lewis
I love this! This is something God started stirring in our hearts before I was even pregnant. The first things we ever bought our children were books. And I would read for hours. Then, I got busy “doing.” Recently God has reminded me to return to the basics — and you just affirmed that decision. Thank you so much for sharing this.
Thank you for the encouragement and a message that is louder that the culture. Even among homeschoolers the pressure to do, do, do is there and the small voice inside that says, “take time and read and be with your children” can be overshadowed. Thank you for rekindling that fire in me and giving me a message that can resonate and drown out those things which suck away time. Thank you dear Sally!
SO true. We have just started reading Hero Tales at devotional time and I am back to having engaged children again. N 3 is very much like you describe your N when he was 3 so am finding things to do with him when I am reading aloud. We read about Ben Carson today and both my older boys said that we’d stopped reading as a family and that we had too much TV again. Hearing the prompting yet again through your blog. God appears to be speaking to me very much through all of your family at the moment. You’re all just going to have to come over to the UK again!!!
Thank you for this encouragement! I want to cultivate this in my home. Finding good books is my biggest challenge.
Hey!! I struck gold about ten years ago finding a catalog called Sonlight. Of course they would love you to buy books from them, but I encourage you to ask for one (free) or go to their web site and look at their lists of read alouds. You will NOT be disappointed. The books can be found at your library. I made several lists on my own, but I always come back to what Sonlight recommends. My boys and I have read over 100 together, and we have 100s to go. Good luck!
Thank you for this important reminder!!! ( & a perfect way to spend this rainy day on the east coast!) Off to grab a book : )
This is great! I just started a few months reading aloud to my boys. I was worried that at 5 and 3 it’d be too much but they LOVE it. We shared tears as we read Charlotte’s Web. My daddy died last year and Charlotte’s death brought some tears for my oldest son as he started to miss his granddaddy. We went on adventures with Stuart Little and are now enjoying AA Mine’s poetry and stories about Pooh and his friends.
Fantastic post, Sally! This is so unbelievably true and every time I am reminded of such a fact it is remotivated to make reading a priority. We do lots of reading here (English Teacher by degree) and have a VERY active 21 mo. old…the trick is truly picking great books and reading at the right times (i.e. knowing when he is ready for some calm time, but not always expecting it to be the case). You prompted me to write about an awesome resource today – but I thought I’d add it here for those interested…THE READ ALOUD HANDBOOK by Jim Trelease is a book that shares his families journey with literature, tons of stats on the benefits and book recommendations for every age and stage. A great resource for those who really want to foster reading in their homes but aren’t sure what to read/where to start. Thank you SO much for sharing this post
I too thank you for this encouragement! Sometimes I wonder if my kids tire of hearing my voice reading to them, talking to them, teaching them, disciplining them, etc. but I know they are receiving the Truth from me and my husband at home while we read the Bible to them. And I love creating fun memories by reading the Pooh bear books and other great literature that I didn’t get the chance to read as a child. This is what I love most about homeschooling!
Sally, again, *thank you*.
I am thoroughly enjoying (and crazily highlighting) Educating the WholeHearted Child. You and your husband are jewels in God’s kingdom. You truly are.
LOVE this!!!
I absolutely love to read and have a huge list to read with my kids in the near future!! Right now we are reading through the Melendy Series…on the second one called The Four Story Mistake. These are by Elizabeth Enright. So descriptive!! 
We also use a Charlotte Mason based curriculum which is rich with wonderful reading selections!!! It is soo fun!
Reading is a big part of our family culture. Reading “Honey for a Child’s Heart” really confirmed in our hearts the importance of reading, not just for academics but for building family identity. My husband reads the Bible at every breakfast, I read children’s literature throughout the day, my husband reads aloud from a novel after every dinner, and again at least two books before bed.
I agree with you!!! Reading is the open door to infinite posibilities, incluiding getting to know our precious Savior. I love books, I treasure them and I’m soo glad to see my little children cuddling with books, reading them and sharing those precious times with them. You’re right, we need to make time for it. We would never find it if we don’t count it as important and essential. I’m really enjoying this series, thank you.
Dear Sally,
You have re-inspired me to not grow weary, but keep plugging along even in the midst of morning sickness and endless needs of a very large family. Thank you again for your time in sharing this wisdom with other moms.
Just recently found your blog and praising God that I have. Dear Sister your words have touched my heart and convicted me so today. I have not been reading as much as I ought to my sweet blessings, and justifying it so conveniently
So glad to read a comment about another Mom with a big family who is also struggling with morning sickness and keeping up with the demands a big family brings.
it encourages me and reminds me that im not the only one. I will be praying for you and at the same time it will encourage me to keep moving forward. Thanks for posting. We are im sure miles apart, but in the same family, Gods family. God bless you and your family.
It is funny because when I was a kid, my mother would punish us not by taking away TV, or grounding us, but by taking books away.
Sally, this is just what I needed to hear. We are reading through the Little Women trilogy in our homeschool and as we start the second book I am growing weary of such long chapters each day. So this morning I took a deep breath and plunged right in, to our complete delight! Thank you, Thank you, for inspiring me to breath life and beauty in our home and showing me to how to shape the character of my children with God’s word and great books.
Sally,
I am a contributing writer at The Better Mom (with you
!) and I must say that I was so blessed to read this post today. I am dealing with so many plates at home (recovering from chronic fatigue, a son w/ special needs and life threatening allergies, all on special diets, and my fairly new blog, and homeschooling). Well, often I feel like a failure in most of these arenas. My husband has repeatedly said, “We are reading so many good things with our kids. Don’t worry about it.” My youngest is 6 and still isn’t reading alone, but he wants to be read to all the time. And my oldest is a great reader as well.
Suffice it to say – Thank you for the encouragement and the reminder.
Now, because of all that we are reading, Mom is getting a re-do education. I can’t believe all of the accolades I got though I didn’t read much in school.
I appreciate your perspective and the wisdom shown in your post, but I want to caution you that being read TO does not always mean enjoying the act of reading. I was rarely read to and can’t get enough of books, while my son is read to on a nightly basis and has been since birth and can’t stand to read. He has an extensive vocabulary, is very verbal, and is a good reader. He just doesn’t like to do so. The issue just isn’t this cut and dried. Should we walk away from the computer and spend time with our kids, discussing deep topics and engaging our minds? Yes. Should we automatically assume that there is something else we should be doing, or doing better, if our children don’t like to read? No. Do your best, be responsive, and lead by example, but realize that you may have one of those children who designs flying cars in his head rather than wanting to read about someone else who does
I know you’re unlikely to be able to get time to answer my question specifically – I know you’re very busy and can’t personally answer every question you get sent!
Oh, for than one Sally Clarkson. I heartily agree with one comment on a different post that wanted to adopt you as ‘Mom’! 
But perhaps if my question is here and you’ve read it, perhaps in the future you’ll be able to address this area in a future blog post and thus speak hope into other moms like myself who are dealing with a regret over past choices, that now seem irreversible.
My question is this. I have four children (aged almost 15 to 6 years old) we started out quite rigid (fill in the blank type work books). I began to notice this killing the creativity of my second son, so by the time my eldest son was 10/11 we had dumped the workbooks. However by that time, my eldest son had lost the love of reading alone, or being read to.
So, to cut a long story short – whilst I’m very encouraged regarding my younger three children to carry on doing what sits right with me regarding reading and creativity (Oh, if only I’d had all your books before I’d begun homeschooling my eldest son when he was 3 years old- oh how different my approach would have been – oh to only have little ones with whom I’d soak up your advice and bless them with it – I so hope all the young moms on here listen to what you’re saying).
But, when it comes to older children, where the foundation has already been laid, and past education decisions have sucked the life out of your child, and that too many years have gone by to change direction – at almost 15 that window of time for my son is rapidly closing,, at this age they’re just not young enough anymore. I want to ask, ‘What now Sally, what would you do if your eldest had been the victim of your poor choice of how to home educate, what is the answer if whilst you’ve matured as a person, mom and as a Christan to be able to take your advice and turn around the education of your younger children, what about the eldest, who for them it’s too late ?”
Sorry about the length. Thank you as always for talking such sense to us weary moms. There are truly so few who actually do.
Susan
* more than one Sally Clarkson, that should say.