The Inestimable Value of a Wise Mother

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Everyone needs a mama’s love

“Mothers, you are the divinely-appointed teachers and guides of your children; and any attempt to free yourselves of this duty is in direct opposition to the will of God. If you neglect them, the consequences are swift and sure. … Spend most of your time with your children. Sleep near them, attend and dress and wash them; let them eat with their mother and father; be their companion and friend in all things and at all times.”

From Golden Thoughts on Mother, Home and Heaven

Being with my wildly idealistic children, living through the noise of our exuberant home (drum set in the basement, electric piano and real piano upstairs,  almost always with someone blaring away, singing, listening to music on their new various stations; rousing, lengthy, loud discussions at the dinner table; wrestling with the dog and watching movies and playing games and feasting with our whole family at home) has reminded me again, that all the trouble was well worth the effort. It all mattered. Really.

Even through all the exhaustion, meals, dishes, late nights, attitudes, weariness–it is of utmost importance.

Januarys are always a bit difficult. The time to be tempted to give up–the gray and extreme cold, not as much out of door time, and weariness in the middle of winter blues, all add up to a heavy season for many.

After many Januaries and winter seasons of my heart, I know that the roots are going deep, the gray will eventually be replaced by buds on trees and light and warmth, and that this can become a great season of memories made, if I craft life so.

How I got to this point–this far and still intact–was through years and years of defining and redefining ideals and seeking the Lord and then living through one day at a time, for a million days. Yet, I see life and beauty in the souls of my very individualistic children–the palpable life of the Lord–who is building them and growing them into healthy, vibrant adults.

Now that Christmas is over, I am bubbling over with excitement for the months ahead. I can’t wait for our conferences which I love and enjoy so much.  I can’t wait to encourage all the precious moms who will attend, because their lives matter–their love, correction, work, is all building a legacy from their lives that will live to glorify God throughout eternity! And that is what the conferences are all about–keeping the ideals alive!

The words above were written over a hundred years ago are still very powerful today.

This, in a culture where the imagination of the importance of mothers to the overall well-being of soul of the next generation has been lost. How affirming it is to see that truth of past generations still applies to us today.

Often, I find that in the absence of a clear enough vision for their children and homes, mothers replace conviction and vision with lots of activities and distractions for their children.

This hyper-activity and rushing around to an endless list of expensive lessons and experiences and toys,  and the buying of the newest expensive curriculum and technological options make moms feel like they are accomplishing something.

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However, when the home-life of children is rich with excellent, classic literature and great stories, passionate Biblical devotions, rousing dinner-table discussions around sumptuous, tasty meals, lots of love and affection given and household chores attended to— a child will become committed to all that is good and excellent and develop a moral and compassionate soul for all the divinely important values.

From the beginning of time, God created the home to be a place sufficient to nurture genius, excellence, graciousness and grand civility.

But the key factor is nothing that can be purchased or owned.

The accomplishment of this grand life is found only in the soul of a mother, through the power of the Holy Spirit, personally mentoring her children.

It is a personal relationship with a real person whose soul is alive in which the deepest imprints of life are given.

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The secrets and deep emotions shared during the goodnight hours in which a the soul of a child is tender and open; the comfort of warm, home-made food shared in the early evening as ideas are shared and discussed and prayers and devotions given; the laughter, stories, advice given in the midst of washing dishes together or sharing of a meal; the heroic and riveting stories read aloud and shared together that establish common patterns of morality, values and dreams in the comfort of the blazing hearth, mugs of steaming hot chocolate and squishing against each other on a den couch are those heavenly things which are food to the soul and nourishment to the mind and conscience of a child fully awake to all that is important in life.

There is no computer, television, software or text book that can pass on such passion, love and motivation.

It is indeed the personal touch of a mother’s heart that creates grand civility, deep affection, care and commitment to the foundations of a family. When the invisible strings of a mother’s heart are tied to the heart of her children through loving sacrifice and nurture, the stability and foundations of a nation become secure and stable.

A mother, living well in her God-ordained role, is of great beauty and inestimable value to the future history of any generation.

Her impact is irreplaceable and necessary to the spiritual formation of children who will be the future adults of the next generation. Fun, comfort, humor, graciousness, spiritual passion, compassion for the lost, hospitality, chores, meals, training, life-giving words, hours and hours of listening and playing and praying and reading—all are parts of the mosaic which go into the process of soul development.

So, though the weariness of the busyness and celebration of Christmas is still upon our hearts and felt in our bodies,

the Spirit and vision of His life in ours will keep us going

the refocusing on His great call, will fuel our commitments to keep going, to keep loving and to keep believing. Taking time with Him this morning has fueled my own soul with new excitement. May He grace you all with His encouragement–right where you are, in whatever season–to know that it really matters. Grace and peace and rest be yours in the days ahead!


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Looking for more encouragement in motherhood? Consider Desperate – Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe, written by Sarah Mae (the mom of little ones knee-deep in the little years) and me (the mom who has raised her children and enjoy them). It’s a book for those who have ever whispered, “I just can’t be a mother today.”  Not sure? Read some reviews here.

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Comments

  1. says

    I take joy in reading God’s Word, and yours this morning! Thank you for your wisdom. As a young mom, I do not have a mentor in our new community yet. I’m praying for one. For now, YOU do just fine! I stumbled upon your book online, ordered it from Dayspring, and it is awesome. Thankfully my parents raised my sister and me to know God’s love. This joy is passed onto the next generation (our children) their grandchildren. I find it pure joy when our sons ask God questions and ponder how God is everywhere! Thank you for your post.

  2. says

    So true….time and time again…I am so blessed by you bringing us right back to the simplicity of it all. Yes, it’s hard work but it’s NOT complicated! :) Thank you! :)

  3. says

    Thank you, ever so, for lifting up the hearts and minds of mothers towards higher truths and aspirations. Your value is inestimable.

    In His Grace,
    Michelle

  4. Angie Dugan says

    Such wisdom. Such truth. Such beauty. Such a blessing. Thank you Sally for your service to the Lord. Again and again He blesses me, He renews me, and He disciples me… through You!

  5. says

    Thank you so much for this post Sally! I am so often tempted to believe people around me (and the world) that what my kids need is more activities, more social play groups, etc. Thank you for reminding me of what my heart already knows about raising my little ones. And thank you Sally for being a true Titus 2 woman!

  6. Michelle Clinton says

    Sally,

    How did you know my heart has been asking the question, “Do I need to try a new curriculum?” “Should we be doing things the way this family over here did it? I do like the way their kids turned out.” Yikes!

    Your words are like water to my soul. I’m drinking it all in. Thank you for the encouragement. Never stop!

    Love,
    Michelle

  7. nurina says

    Thank you Sally! What great encouragement at just the perfect time! I needed to read this today. :)

    I appreciate your wisdom and love for the things of the Lord!

  8. Priscilla Fowler says

    You don’t know how right you are. I wrote the following on Sarah Mae’s blog because I needed to share how the book Desperate is helping me, too. Thank you so much for your wisdom!

    I’m not a mama, yet. But, I had legal custody of my younger sister because we came from a shattered family, and our mother just couldn’t care for her. My father had passed away a few years prior. The custodial arrangement didn’t go as planned. I did a lot of things wrong, and she just wasn’t in the place to hear out the wisdom that I did have. Mind you, I was in my mid-twenties, and I was broken myself. For years, I have felt like I failed her. My whole world was hers for so many years…every decision that I made, I made it with her in mind…even when I was a kid myself. The neighborhood kids called me “little mama” as I wheeled her stroller down the street so we could have a break from the constant arguing at home. I think everyone knew I had more than a sibling relationship with my sister back then, and I was just 10. I look at 10 year old children now, and I think…How did I manage to take on those roles at that age? How did my sister? My sister grew up to be a woman with a big chip on her shoulder because of the childhood abuse that we both faced. We both fell into sin to numb the pain. We’ve had a broken relationship for a couple of years, but God mended our relationship late last year. Now, she comes to me for advice. I am reading this book because I need to be freed from the guilt I have over this relationship. I need to have counsel now while we are in the planning stages of having our babies so that I can be a better mama, and wife in the future. I was desperate for so many years, and now I really need to breath. I need to release some of this guilt. I need to breath again, and let myself off the hook for a desperate situation.

  9. julie says

    I am thankful for the daily reminder of my role. I am in need of it right now. It is so amazing how the Spirit knows our need and comes along side and fills it so perfectly. Thank you for being a willing vessel.

  10. Cathy says

    Oh, I so wish I’d found your blog and books earlier. I read Desperate a couple of weeks ago and then ordered The Mission of Motherhood. Our Family Ways, and the Whole-hearted Child book along with Mom Walk or something like that. I am planning to try to have a “Desperate” get-together with some other moms but know so few with whom I have much in common (we’re the only homeschoolers at church, considered overly strict b/c we are limit video game and media usage and such). I feel like I’m in a place where I know what I should do but have no clue how to get there, you know? Really hoping it works out for me to come to the TX Conference next month. Your writing has been a huge blessing to me and moves me to tears almost daily. So thankful for ladies like you out there even if they are hard to find!

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